Page 43 of Look at Her and Die

There was something definitely wrong with me.

Posy had given me zero indication that he even liked me, let alone felt about me in a way that I did about him.

I should definitely get control of myself.

A man like Posy would never want anything to do with a woman like me.

Not to mention, I came with a lot of baggage.

Speaking of baggage, I came to a stuttering halt in the middle of an aisle when a familiar face popped up at the end of the aisle.

My mother.

“Mom!” I barked.

She whipped her head around, and her eyes widened.

“What are you doing here, honey?” my mom asked, looking for an escape route.

She should.

I was going to chew her ass out.

“I’m shopping for food for your children with money that I earned running your place of business. All the while keeping it afloat on my own, with zero compensation for it,” I snapped. “Where have you been?”

My mother’s face went scrunchy, letting me know that she was angry that I was pointing out her inadequacies.

“I’m busy,” she said as she stepped back to her cart.

Her fully filled cart.

I narrowed my eyes. “Where are you getting the money to buy that?”

My mother’s face went guilty.

“You better not be pulling it out of the diner account, because I have to pay bills tomorrow, and if that money isn’t there, I don’t have enough money to keep the lights on!” I snapped.

Not with her constantly taking money out all willy-nilly, spending it on things we couldn’t even deduct on our taxes.

My mother’s face flushed, and I was thankful that at least she didn’t have access to the money that I used to pay our house payment.

I’d learned that lesson the hard way.

Plus, the kids had had to take showers at the Y for a couple of weeks because we had no water at our own place.

I’d had to take spit baths at the diner.

It was utterly embarrassing, and she didn’t fucking care.

I didn’t know why I bothered with her.

If it wasn’t for the kids, I’d have taken off years ago.

As it was, I couldn’t figure out how to crawl my way out of this fucked-up life while keeping my siblings clothed and fed.

My mom sighed. “I’m not buying much.”

“You’re buying more than you need,” I pointed to her cart. “What are you going to do with all that face cream? That’s way too expensive!”