Page 45 of Look at Her and Die

When I got my WIC card out to pay for the WIC items, I didn’t try to hide it.

I wasn’t embarrassed about what I had to do to keep my family afloat.

Speaking of…

“I also have guardianship of my siblings because this is such a usual thing for her,” I said. “She likes to go off on a walkabout, and I have to take care of everyone. After the first time she did this when I was like eighteen or so, and Kent got super sick and needed his appendix removed, we made sure that I had the power to do the things I needed to when she wasn’t here.”

“She sounds awesome.” He started to check his own things out.

“Don’t forget the coupons,” I called as he went to pay.

He pulled them out of his pocket, and I was happy to see that I’d saved him eight dollars.

His brows went up in surprise as he paid.

“That’s a lot of money in the grand scheme of things,” he pointed out.

“I know,” I sighed as we walked out the door. “One day, it’s my goal to never use coupons again.”

He walked with me to my car and then helped me get my groceries in.

When he grabbed the last bags, I took my cart to the return corral, and he placed the last of my bags into the trunk.

I waved at him when he started backing away. “Thanks for keeping me company.”

His eyes were filled with mirth as he said, “See you for a grilled cheese tomorrow.”

“I’ll be there,” I grumbled.

Because where the fuck else would I be?

I got home in a much better mood than when I’d left.

It was as I was unloading the bags in the kitchen that I realized that I’d come home with a few more than I’d expected.

When I got to the bag of candy, my heart literally jolted inside of my chest.

My eyes went watery.

But they didn’t spill over.

At least, not until I got to the second bottle of Tide.

Twelve

When I see Posy staring at me, sometimes I can’t figure out if he’s admiring me, or second guessing his choices.

—Searcy’s secret thoughts

SEARCY

Running at night wasn’t the first choice for physical activity at that time of day, but when you worked your ass off to make ends meet, you got the run in where you could.

Today I felt like running.

My mom had arrived back in the fold, pouring back into the house and acting like she never left.

She started taking her shifts back at the diner like she’d never left, and when she saw the changes that I’d made over the months, she’d been irritated.

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