Page 23 of The Kings of Kearny

“I would have listened,” she said. “I might not have wanted to believe you at first, but I would have looked into it.” She turned to Gran. “I take my patients’ health very seriously.”

Gran smiled and patted her arm, much like she had Jakob earlier. Gran could be blunt and a little inappropriate at times, but deep down, she was a comforter. “I know you do.”

“That’s great,” Jakob said, his tone gaining a rough edge. “But you don’t answer phones here, Doc.”

“Not helpful,” I told him and then turned toward Dr. Perez. “Have you noticed anything? Questionable behavior from a fellow staff member? Residents not responding to meds as they should?”

She sent me a meaningful look. “I couldn’t answer your last question even if I had. That’s client privilege.”

Fine. I’d play it her way. “Has Gran not responded to her meds like you expected her to?”

The gleam in her eye said I’d asked the right question. “She’s responded better than expected. To everything but her arthritis prescription.”

I frowned. “You think it could have been tampered with?”

“It’s a possibility,” she said. “Her flare-ups have shown little to no improvement since we started the regiment, and up until now, I was stumped by it. I even called a friend over in Houston who specializes in osteoarthritis to see if he’s run into a similar response.”

“And has he?” I asked.

She shook her head.

“But isn’t it just a generic nonsteroidal anti-inflammatory scrip?” I asked. “Why would anyone want to steal that?” As Gran’s power of attorney, I knew every pill she’d been prescribed.

Dr. Perez tucked her hair behind her ear. “When paired with lithium, a simulation of the effects of an opioid can sometimes be achieved. It comes with a huge risk of potentially catastrophic side effects, but...” She shrugged.

I sighed. “But people looking to get high might be willing to risk that.”

Gran’s expression turned grim. “I want to get drug tested.”

Dr. Perez looked to me for confirmation.

“Please drug test my grandmother,” I said.

Dr. Perez rose from her seat. “I’ll be back in a few minutes.”

When she was gone, I turned to Gran. “She better not find pot in your system.”

Gran’s expression flashed to innocence. “I don’t remember smoking any dope.”

I eyed her. Gran had told Jakob that I could be stubborn as a mule sometimes, but if I was, it was because I’d learned it from her. “Using your Alzheimer’s as a shield is low, even for you.”

A glint of steel shone in her eyes. “I have no idea what you’re talking about.”

“Have it your way,” I said. “But I’ll know if you’re lying when the results come back.”

She crossed her arms over her chest and leaned into the couch. “I guess you will.”

She wasn’t going to back down, which meant that she’d definitely been smoking pot. Where the hell did she get it from in here?

Over by the slider, Jakob stared out the window like we’d bored him. I followed his gaze, searching through Gran’s makeshift herb garden for the distinct leaf pattern of marijuana plants. I didn’t see any, but I’d go out there and get a better look before I left today, just to be sure.

Dr. Perez came back a few minutes later, and she and Gran disappeared into Gran’s bedroom to collect the samples in some semblance of privacy. Jakob and I were left alone in the living room. I studiously ignored him because every time I looked at him, my irritation flared back to life. Unfortunately, Gran’s rooms were swathed in cream and off-white, and he stood in a self-contained spot of darkness that crept into my periphery even when I turned my head away.

This was why it was best to bail after sex. Before things got complicated or the memory of a brain-melting orgasm was tainted when your partner revealed themselves as the world’s biggest jackass. The next time my inner cavewoman reared her head, I would club her over it myself.

“All done,” Dr. Perez announced when they reemerged. “I should have the lab work back by tomorrow morning if I put a rush on it.”

“Thanks,” I said, rising from my seat. “You’ll call me when you get the results?”