Page 18 of You & I, Rewritten

“I’m going to stop you right there,” he says, staring me down. His expression is soft, concerned even, but his eyes could burn a hole right through my heart.Shit.“I am not one to devalue the feelings of others, especially you of all people, Will. But I think now is an important moment to remind you of professional decorum in the workplace.” He is every bit the dismissive and blunt man I met on my first day. I attempt to swallow the lump that is lodged in my throat. I know I’ve just crossed so many professional lines and made a spectacle in the office. I can all but feel the stares of our team on the other side of the door eagerly trying to figure out what’s going on inside of Graham’s office.

“Because at the end of the day, the success and failures of our team fall onme,” he says as he jabs a finger sharply into his own chest. He takes another step closer, his dominating presence now overwhelming the space between us. “Yes, I ended up speaking to Lana after our conversation at the event. Her not showing up after the time and effortmyteam has given her writing was a bad look and I wanted to remind her thatyou,as her editor, deserved better, and if we were going to continue a working relationship, she needed to treat you with the respect that comes with your expertise.”

His words are a punch straight in the gut.Of courseGraham involved himself and it literally had nothing to do with me because he’s right, this is his team and his family’s business. Hell, he was on some level defending me. Tears threaten to betray me in a moment when I need to appear strong.

I have to get out of here.

“Your feelings are valid, Will.” He steps around me, brushing my shoulder gently as he passes to open the door, sending that all too familiar electric spark across my skin, leaving me rooted in place. “But going forward, I’d urge you to remember that I don’t need to run the way I do business byyou. Is there anything else you so urgently need to get off your chest? Or can we all get back to work?” His cold tone is my dismissal.

He’s standing in his now open doorway, our team clearly trying their best to appear busy and not at all vested in the alpha male throw down that just occurred in Graham’s office.

Move, Will. MOVE. You look like such a pathetic idiot right now. He knows it, the entire office now knows it…you know it.

I don’t want to face him. I don’t think my heart could handle another Graham Austin stare-down right now, so I quickly turn and exit his office without raising my gaze to meet his. As I head down the hallway toward my desk, I see Klair out of the corner of my eye, my jacket and phone already in an outstretched hand. Klair, whose eyes are brimming with sympathy and concern, doesn’t wait for me to say anything when I get to her—I don’t think I could right now without completely breaking down in tears.

“Go,” she says gingerly rubbing my arm. “I’ll cover you for the rest of the day if anything pertinent pops up. Go home, relax, and I’ll be there soon.”

It’s in moments like this that I’m most appreciative for the relationship I have with Klair. She knows me more intimately than anyone else on this planet and without even trying, she knows exactly how to show up for her friends.

Succumbing to the nagging voice in the back of my mind telling me toturn around, I risk another glance in Graham’s direction. His tall and muscular body appears slumped as he leans into his office’s door frame. Our eyes meet for the briefest of moments, his face scrunched with confusion, and I watch as he releases a fractured breath, turning away from me and closing his door behind him…closing his door on me.Closing the door on the hope of us.

“Well, there’s another thing I’ve ruined,” I mutter to myself as I exit the heavy double doors of our office, dragging the weight of my shame with me.

* * *

“God, Klair…I fucked up so bad.” I’m in full panic mode and poor Klair is doing everything in her power to help me come down from this as we sit together on the couch, her arms around me. “I barged into his office like some dramatic asshole, demanding answers and speaking to him so cruelly.Not only did I humiliate myself professionally, I treated the guy I amsointo like trash.” I drop my head into my hands, feeling Klair rub my back.

“I have to admit I was a little shocked this afternoon.” Klair’s voice is tiptoeing the line of worry and bluntness. “I’ve never seen that side of you before.” I’m instantly humiliated, which I know wasn’t her intention, but hearing the surprise in Klair’s voice, one of the people who adores me most in this world, shows just how out of line I was earlier.

I lean my head against hers. “I don’t have a valid excuse for my behavior. There is none.” The tears I’ve been holding back all evening now begin to fall. “Sometimes, I just can’t rein in my emotions. Seeing that email from Lana made me feel so insecure and incapable.” My confession releases the grip it has had on my heart for a while and now I’m full-blown sobbing into Klair’s shoulder. “It made me feel like he didn’t think I was good enough.”

Klair, who’s clearly struggling to shift against the weight of my body, turns to face me. “Will, you look at me right now.” She takes my face in her hands and wipes my tears with her thumbs. “I’m not going to sit here and tell you how you’re feeling is wrong because clearly, on some level, you believe those things to be true, which absolutely breaks my heart.” Her voice cracks and she pulls me into a hug. “But there is not a single soul in your life who thinks you’re not good enough. I hope you know by now that Graham is for sure included in that statement.”

I’d like to be able to sayOf course I know that, silly, but I never know where I stand with that man. One moment he’s thrusting against me out of nowhere at the bar and the next he’s staring daggers into my soul. Do I think he is sexually attracted to me? Maybe. Do I think he likes me? Absolutely not in this moment. Hemost definitelyloathes me.

“Ehhh, I’m not so sure about that.”Not anymore at least.Untangling myself from Klair, I give her a kiss on the top of her head. “I can’t thank you enough for tonight, truly. You have no idea how much just sitting here with me means. I’m going to take a shower and try to calm down.”

“I love you forever, Will Cowen. Don’t you ever forget that,” she says as I head to my room. “Nothing will ever change that.”

“I know, and I love you more, Klair Thompson,” I shout over my shoulder before closing my bedroom door.

Right now, the only thing that sounds good is letting the scalding water of my shower release some of the tension I feel across every inch of my body. I light my favorite candles, put Taylor Swift on shuffle and head into my bathroom, stripping along the way. Stepping into the heat of the cascading water is an almost instant relief from the pounding headache I’ve had all afternoon. Massaging my favorite mint shampoo into my hair, the thought of Graham comes crashing into my momentary peace…the sound of his voice, his smile, those big hands and how they felt on me.

Arousal burns through my veins, outweighing any other thought or emotion right now, and I feel myself harden as I let my hands trail over the peaks of my chest, the defined sections of my stomach. I grip my cock at the thought of Graham grinding against me, his thick bulge pressed against mine. I moan remembering just how good it felt having him against me, feeling his desire match my own. As I start to slide my hand along my length, I picture what could have been if Graham hadn’t walked away that night. I see him grabbing my hips and pulling me closer to him.

Fuck, this feels so good.

In this fantasy, I watch him turn me around so fast and push me up against the wall, spreading my legs and biting my neck as I push back against him.God, I need this to happen. NOW.I begin moving faster, the promise of release getting oh so close the more I think about Graham. His toned body. The way he says my name. Everything about him intoxicates me and despite what happened today, I want this man so fucking bad it’s killing me—I need him.

I feel myself reaching the point of no return, knowing my body and how desperate it is for release. I continue stroking my now throbbing cock, the anticipation building higher and higher…thump, thump, thump.

“Will!” Klair shouts behind my bathroom door, causing me to completely freeze, dick in hand. “Can you please come out here?” I sigh looking down at my now limp member.

Sorry old friend, moment’s passed…isn’t living with a girl so fun?

I finish, not in the way I wanted to, in the shower, towel off, and quickly throw on some sweats.

“What issoooimportant that you interrupted…” my voice trails off as I stare that answer right in the eye.

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