Page 92 of Winging It with You

To makemylife easier? To avoid confronting my own fear?

“Come on,” I say when Frankie wraps up what seems to be part two of his out-of-this world adventure. I rip the blankets off the bed dramatically and scoop them both into my arms, which sends their adorable giggles ricocheting off every surface. “Let’s go get some of those delicious cinnamon rolls.”

We slowly make our way downstairs, passing wall after wall of treasured family photos. Looking at our family at various milestones is like peering into a time capsule of a life.

Stefan is bent over the kitchen island when we reach the bottom of the stairs. He’s carefully layering thick icing on an oversize tray of cinnamon rolls. They smell fresh out of the oven and there’s something comforting about the sweet aroma filling the room, so familiar to family and cozy weekend mornings.

As soon as Frankie eyes the cinnamon rolls, he becomes restless. “Daddy, are they ready?”

“Just about, mijo,” Stefan says without looking up from the tray before him. I set Frankie on one of the five barstools at the long kitchen island and lower Lola to the ground, their eyes glued to the rich bowl of icing.

Lola quickly swipes a finger into the bowl and plops it into her mouth before Stefan can object.

“Cariña, be patient,” he says, shaking his head with a grin.Lola hugs him around the waist and Stefan sets down the spoon he was using. “Nice bedhead,” Stefan says, padding over in my direction and greeting me with a big hug.

He’s never shied away from affection, which is a major green flag in my eyes. There have been plenty of Elise’s exes who always seemed uncomfortable around her gay little brother. Some would make it a point to offer an extra-firm handshake or give incredibly cold one-armed bro hugs the second I came around. Not Stefan.

From day one, he couldn’t help but showcase his natural warmth with every single one of our family members, and it’s something I’ll always be appreciative of. More male-on-male affection normalcy, please. “Where’s everyone else?” I ask when he finally lets me go.

“Your parents went to pick up some carne asada for later,” he says, heading back to the kitchen island, “and Elise is at your spot.”

I turn my head toward the lake. Stefan grabs a few plates from the cabinet and uses a spatula to serve Lola and Frankie. The cinnamon rolls are as large as their heads, and I don’t think I’ve ever seen them this excited.

“I just put on some coffee, hermano,” Stefan says, nodding at the coffeepot. “It should be ready.” Bless this man.

I pour us each a mug, handing one to a very appreciative Stefan, and slide two cinnamon rolls onto a plate. Then I sneak out the back door and make my way to the dock while Lola and Frankie are momentarily distracted by their sweets.

I find Elise sitting in one of the two worn Adirondack chairs dad and I built the summer before I went into middle school. Or high school? Beyond being slightly weathered from constant exposure to the elements, they’ve held up nicely.

She gives me a soft smile when I join her, like she’s been waiting for me. I shove nearly half a cinnamon roll in my mouth and pass the plate to Elise.

“If I haven’t told you lately that you’re my favorite, you most certainly are.” She rolls her eyes after taking her own massive bite. “How’d you sleep?” she asks, her mouth full.

“Like the dead.”

But truthfully, it felt odd sleeping anywhere without Asher. Hearing his breathing. Feeling the warmth of his arm draped over me. The burn of every sneak-attack kiss he’d place on my neck.

Thinking of him makes it hard to swallow.

“…until Frankie and Lola decided it was time to get up,” I say, a smile spreading across my lips.

“They are the official deciders when it comes to day-starting.” Elise reaches over and takes my coffee mug.

“What?” she asks when she sees my mouth agape.

“Nothing’s changed with you. Is that…my sweatshirt?”

She looks down at the worn Madison West High School crewneck she’s wearing. “Seriously? You’ve not been home in ten thousand years and have lost your claim to anything in your room. Sorry, but whatever you’ve left behind is fair game.”

Can’t argue with that.

“Speaking of,” she says, tucking a leg underneath her. “How does it feel to be back?”

It’s far too early to have this conversation with her. Elise is one of the only people in my life I don’t have to worry about being judgmental. But she’s also the only person on this planet I can’t bullshit. “It’s bittersweet. I’ve missed so much…”

“And whose fault is that?”

“You don’t need to remind me.” I stare off into the lake. Thesoft morning light dances across the shallow water. “Remember when we decided it would be a good idea to camp out in the canoe?”

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