Page 95 of Pucking Your Best Friend

“See! And that’s why I need you. So I know when I’m being an asshole.” Dax pointed his index finger at him meaningfully. “So, Maddie and you are together now and everything’s fine, right?”

Matt hesitated.

“Okaaay,” Dax said slowly. “Everything is not fine?”

He sighed. “I have no idea. I feel like everything should be fine.” He laughed mirthlessly. “Shit, Dax, I’ve never been so scared in my life.”

His friend blinked, surprised. “Scared of what?”

“Of fucking it up. I panic when I think about losing her. She has nothing to do with the game, you know? She’s friends with me even though I play hockey, notbecause. She’s the only constant outside of my family and hockey that I’ve ever had. And I don’t want to...”

“Fuck it up,” Dax echoed.

“Yes!”

“Then don’t fuck it up,” he stated simply.

“What if I’ve already fucked it up?”

“By sleeping with her and declaring her your girlfriend?”

“Yes!”

Dax frowned. “Because…you don’t even want to be with her?”

He snorted. “Don’t be ridiculous, of course I want to be with her!”

“Because…the sex sucks?”

Matt opened his mouth.

“Never mind,” Dax backpedaled quickly. “I don’t want to know. By your expression, it’s not the sex either. So, I don’t understand. What have you fucked up?”

“Our friendship,” he murmured. “Our…safe friendship.”

“Safe,” Dax repeated, and a light bulb went off in his mind. “The friendship that’s safer than your relationship.”

“Friendships last longer than relationships, on average,” he murmured.

“Hey, that’s whatHappy Girlfriendmagazine said,” Dax confirmed happily. “Okay, but…” He blinked. “Do you love her?”

“Yes,” he answered without hesitating.

“As a girlfriend or…as a girlfriend-girlfriend?”

Matt lifted the corner of his mouth. “I love her in every way there is.”

Dax nodded as if he immediately understood. “But if you were to break up…”

“I would lose my girlfriend and best friend in one fell swoop.”

“So, if you had never gotten together…”

“I would lose my girlfriend, but I probably would never lose my best friend,” he summed up.

“I understand.” Deep in thought, Dax stared at the ice, then murmured, “Well, there’s no harm in trying the relationship, is there? If it doesn’t work out, Matt, and you both realize that soon enough, then maybe you can go back to being friends. How long have you been intimate? Two weeks? That’s not that long.” He cleared his throat. “Maddie hasn’t told Lucy yet. She’s obviously still uncertain, isn’t she?”

Matt frowned. It didn’t feel uncertain between them. But, yes, Maddie usually shared her feelings with Lucy…that is, unless it was something bad.

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