Page 84 of The Catch

“Come in,” he rasped, his stomach sour.

Cat opened the door, the light from the hallway shadowing her face as she hovered hesitantly in the threshold. “I brought you more pain meds,” she said, holding out the bottle. In her other hand, she held a glass of water.

He used the advantage of the dark to take her in inconspicuously, now that she wasn’t bundled in winter gear. She had on a tight pair of jeans and a red and white striped sweater that hung off one shoulder. Her feet were bare, and without her heels, she looked tiny—like a little Christmas elf bearing narcotics. Maybe he was just high from his fever.

Her hair was up on top of her head now, and he was glad to see she could still tie it in that wild-looking knot he liked, even though she’d cut it.

Christ, he needed to stop. What did it matter to him anymore what she did with her hair?

Cat handed him two pills, and he took them, finishing the glass of water in two gulps.

“Do you want something to eat?” she asked. “It’s been a long time since you’ve had anything.”

“I’m fine.”

“You should eat.”

He didn’t answer. The thought didn’t appeal to him in the least, but even if it had, he wasn’t going to let her wait on him.

She seemed intent on it, though, taking a few more steps in as he settled into bed.Their bed.She picked up his dress pants and shirt that he’d tossed on the floor and laid them on his chair. “Josh, I’m here so I can help you. You need to eat something to get your energy—”

“I said, I’m fine, Cat,” he snapped. “I’ve been taking care of myself for twenty years for Christ’s sake.” She froze, her shoulders slumping, and he dropped his face into his hands, rubbing at his pounding temples with his thumbs. “I’m sorry. I’m just… I’m really not hungry. What about you?” He knew he’d stolen her lunch break, and they hadn’t exactly been in the mood to stop for dinner.

“I made a sandwich,” she admitted. “I hope you don’t mind.”

“Of course not.” Again the way she spoke to him like a stranger burned in his chest. As if he’d ever care about her eating his food. It was only a few weeks ago that he’d asked her to share this house with him and everything in it. And she’d turned him down.

It was all wrong, this new reality between them. It was awkward and painful. They weren’t strangers or polite acquaintances—he missed her. That was why he couldn’t be this close to her. He rolled to his side, pulling the heavy blanket up to his neck. “I should probably go back to sleep.”

“Well, just let me know if you get hungry.”

“Cat.” She stopped in the doorway, looking back at him over her shoulder. “You probably don’t have any clothes.”

She shook her head.

“You can borrow something to sleep in,” he said, turning onto his side and adjusting his pillow. “Help yourself. You know where everything is.”

He heard her shuffling around in the dark, opening his drawers and closing them. Then she went into the bathroom, probably looking for her toothbrush. It was still there next to his. He was simultaneously embarrassed that he hadn’t tossed it and glad she’d have it tonight.

“Thank you,” she whispered. Then the door shut, and he was alone again.

Thirty-five

Cat tossed to her sideon the stiff mattress in Josh’s guest room, using the extra pillow to cover her eyes from the morning sun. She’d barely slept, instead replaying their conversation over and over while she stared at the glow-in-the-dark planet stickers on his ceiling. The rest of the room had been redecorated, but the little solar system was still there to remind her that twelve-year-old Josh had once slept in this bed.

I’ve been taking care of myself for twenty years.

There was something in his voice when he’d told her that the night before that she couldn’t get out of her head. It was a sort of a resigned sadness, maybe even bitterness. It didn’t mesh with the generally happy guy she knew.What was it Minnie had called him? Well-adjusted.Josh was well-adjusted. He didn’t carry around secret emotional baggage. He talked about things; he showed all his cards. She was the one who shoved things down and let them fester, like a decade-long grudge with her sister, and every single thing that had ever transpired between her and Micah. She didn’t think Josh held onto that stuff. It wasn’t like him to let things hide until they burst out in a moment of weakness. Or maybe it was like him, and she just didn’t know him like she thought she did.

Had Josh felt uncared for as a kid? Did he still feel that way? Guilt wiggled inside her belly. Maybe Josh wasn’t as well-adjusted as everyone thought he was. Maybe he’d shown her that, but she just hadn’t listened. She cared about him more than she’d believed she was capable of, and she hadn’t let him know.

She tossed off the blankets and let the chilly air hit her legs. The snow was falling heavier than the day before, and there was still the issue of Josh’s Jeep being stranded in the city. He definitely wasn’t going out in this weather as sick as he was. Maybe Dylan would take a ride with her to get it. Though, she was quickly reminded that she would have no reason to come back if he did. Dylan could take over helping Josh, and there would be nothing left for her to do, no excuse to be there. As much as she’d wanted to deny it, Josh was acting like this was done and over with. Maybe that would be the last time she’d ever see him. The thought snaked through her, tightening around her already wounded heart.

She didn’t have much time to dwell on it, though. As soon as the worst-case scenarios began forming in her brain, she heard the click of his bedroom door opening. Despite her fears about an awkwardgood morning, she still rushed down the stairs to check on him.

When she saw him in the kitchen, standing back to her and looking through the refrigerator, her stomach fell. Maybe this was a bad idea, after all. How could she think she would be okay with waking up to him, his hair damp and messy, a pair of sweatpants slung low on his hips and a plain white t-shirt clinging to his back muscles? Even like this, he was so beautiful and he used to be hers. Now she was sleeping in his guest bed.

She cleared her throat and rubbed her arms nervously. “Hey. How are you feeling?”

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