Page 52 of Wish Lists and Road Trips

Fair point, and my track record gave her a full two legs to stand on with her skepticism. I’d once fallen hard for my mailman because I saw him pet the neighbor’s dog. He was ten years my senior and turned out he did hard time before joining the postal service, but in my head I’d woven an epic story of the rehabilitative power of love.

This was different, though. Unlike the mailman, Nick and I were sharing a tiny little room and he waslookingat me.

And he’d also become my friend. One who trusted me with precious things, which was rare. And one who I trusted back in a way I couldn’t explain.

I wasn’t dumb enough to tell Meri about Dean to make my point. Not over the phone. She couldn’t do anything but worry, and Meri didn’t know Nick. If I told her I was fine because I was with him, she would have no reason to believe me. But I could tell her one thing.

“He hasn’t tried to lay a hand on me once. Shared hotel rooms, cramped cars.”When we were wrapped around each other in that bed.“You know. He could have.”

Maybe I wanted her to confirm that it really was Nick’s goodness that kept him from taking things any further last night, as opposed to a billboard-sized sign that he didn’t have any interest in tangoing with the weird girl who’d hitched a ride in his Range Rover.

“I know what you’re thinking,” Meri said when I blew out a sorry-sounding sigh into the phone. “Where does this Nick live?”

“Philadelphia.”

She groaned. “Brit, you’re about to buy a househere. How do you see this developing?”

“I haven’t really thought about the logistics.”

“And do you think getting involved with someone right after you end an engagement is a good idea?”

Was that what we were doing? Getting involved? It seemed so much more cosmic than a decision about distance or the appropriateness of the timing. It felt out of my hands. Fateful.

I’m so ridiculous.

There was a long silence, then more splashing. “Okay, listen. I don’t know your Nick, but maybe your whole psychic thing is rubbing off on me because I feel good that you’re with him.”

“I’m not psychic,” I muttered. “If I were, I’d never have to wonder how anyone felt. I’d just read their mind.” I winced, imagining myself peering into Nick’s brain and finding him looking at me the way Sean did—confused and a little disgusted with himself. “Or maybe I wouldn’t. I’m too fragile.”

Meri barked a laugh. “Fragile like a bomb, babe.”

I laughed too and salt water rushed my eyeballs. “Thanks, Meri.”

“Stay safe with your Nick and call me when you get to New York. Justin and I are making ourselves available for any crises. Not that you’ll need it,” she rushed, careful not to insinuate that my reputation preceded me. “But we’ll go to dinner after the auction, to celebrate, okay?”

I smiled, letting myself roll around in the feeling of excitement I got when I pictured that house. “I wouldn’t miss it for the world. I’ll see you soon and we can drink wine and make Pinterest boards for every room.”

“Oh, you know I am down for that. Night, Brit.”

I ended the call and pulled up the real estate auction site, running my thumb over the picture of the gray clapboard siding. I just needed to make it mine.

Though, a tiny voice whispered in my ear, reminding me that getting back also meant the end of nights sleeping in the same room as Nick. Of spending long days trying to make him smile for me. Melting when he did. Everything was changing but not even close to the way I’d attempted to force it to.

The thing about having a ticking clock hanging over your time with another person is you have to gorge yourself on every piece of them before they disappear from your life. You’ve got to dig into their soul and suck up every little detail, so you can remember it when you’re alone and missing them.

Luckily, some cosmic shift had occurred and Nick was letting me do just that.

“Oh! This is a good one,” I said, plucking another card.

He tossed a Rummy Bear in his mouth. “Do you have any idea what’s going on in this scene?”

I’d convinced him to pull out the bottom bed—his bed—for the full slumber party experience, and now we were watchingA League of Their Ownon my phone. Well, he was. I was sitting with my legs slung over his lap, torturing him with the rest of the intimate question cards.

“I’ve seen this movie before,” I said, waving the card in his face. “What is your best physical attribute?”

He groaned and I giggled. He was so humble for a guy who looked like him. I wondered if he knew.

“Jesus. I have no idea.”

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