Page 70 of Milked

“Tell that to my soul. I’ll never forgive myself for not doing more.”

“What’s changed? Why are you back then?”

“You’re the only one here who knows about my bisexuality. Rowan knew, but… Anyway, I’ve met a couple of men who have helped heal me in a way. I’m not all fixed, but they’ve given me hope that I’ll be happy again. I’m definitely happier until my crash on the anniversary of my sister’s murder.”

“Men?”

I nodded and swallowed. It was one thing to come out as bi. It was another to admit you were in a polyamorous relationship. “Yeah, I’m seeing two men. They were a couple before me, but they brought me into their fold. I hadn’t expected to fall in love or be in a relationship with them, but here I am. And they love me back. I know it’s… unusual, but I love it.”

“It’s definitely different. I’m not sure how folks around here will take that, but I still like you. I’m still fucking pissed at you for ditching us, but we’ll always be friends, Rye.”

“Thanks, Way. I’m here to fix shit with not only my parents, but with you, too. I’m not moving back, but I’ll try to stay in touch more and visit as much as I can. You can always come to see me, too.”

He bumped my shoulder, and I looked at him and smiled. “It’s good to see you. You look like shit, though.”

I huffed a laugh. “Yeah, it’s been a rough few days. I had a massive relapse in my grief.”

“Because you didn’t face it. You ran.”

I nodded. “Truth. I just didn’t know how to face it. She wasn’t just my sister. She was my twin. When she died, I lost half of myself.”

“I totally get that. You two were really close, too.”

We sat in silence for a while, a chilly breeze blowing through us. I shivered a little, wearing only a flannel button-up. I smiled inwardly, thinking that Finn would lose his mind seeing me in country wear.

My mind mulled over whether I should tell him the truth about how I felt about him and whether it would serve any purpose. Not to tell him so I could gauge his reaction and see how he felt, but to be fully transparent from now on—no more hiding shit.

“I had this huge crush on you for years.”

Waylon chuckled, surprising me. “No shit. I hadnoidea. It was obvious from the start, Rye. You suck at playing poker. When you told me you were bi, I thought you would ask me out or some shit, but you never did. I mean, you know I’m straight, but I was kind of hurt that you didn’t.” His laugh was self-deprecating. “It’s weird, right? But it never bothered me, man. I’m just glad we stayed friends, and I’m glad you’re here so we can move forward.”

My face bloomed red. “God, I had no idea I was that obvious. Well… thanks for taking it so well.”

Waylon hopped off the fence. “I gotta head to work. I was supposed to be at the farm earlier, but they let me come in late so I could see you.”

I hopped off with him, and he pulled me into another suffocating hug. All that throwing hay did his muscles good.

“It’s good to see you, Rye. When are you headed back?”

“In a few days.”

“Cool. Then we should grab a couple of beers before you go.”

“Sounds good, Way. And… thank you for forgiving me.”

He waved a dismissive hand. “There’s nothing to forgive.”

I watched him walk away, full of feelings of love for him, but now it was a different kind of love—a brotherly love.

Chapter 24

Finn

“Yousurehavebeendoing a lot of smiling lately,” Casey said as we waited for our photoshoot. Even doing another shoot with Marc Laurent couldn’t get to me. The man was a fucking pervert, but a lot of people in this industry were constantly being surrounded by the most beautiful and fit men and women. Not that it was a goddamn excuse.

“I’m in a relationship, and it’s been good,” I said.

“Yeah? Oh, with that guy from the party? The one you turned me down for?”

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