She played me. Which means she never deserved me in the first place.
I take one hard look around and stand to my full height and stretch myself out before leaving as if I was never here.
Closing the front door as quietly as I can to remain undetected, I walk with purpose, not pain, toward my car and jump in.
My expression is neutral and stoic. I don’t feel rage or sadness.
Heartbreak? Nah, not that either. This is my awakening because her disloyalty only proves that she wasn’t made for me.
She lost me. I didn’t lose her.
42
ARI
When I came out of the shower the other day, I got this weird feeling that Nathan had been in my apartment. It was as if I could smell his aftershave as his phantom fragrance filled the air.
I miss him, so maybe that’s why I’m imagining things.
I still can’t bring myself to call him—I feel awful lying about being sick when I’m perfectly fine health wise.
Heartbroken for my family, yes, but otherwise I am fit and well.
Guilt lingers—I should have told him the truth about who I am and if I don’t return to work soon, he’ll get suspicious.
Still, my guilt is different now. It’s not just about deception; it’s about what I’ve uncovered.
I’ve yet again dissected every piece of evidence surrounding my family’s deaths, read everything twice, three times—sometimes more. I hired a PI, who agreed to help me as an emergency and worked tirelessly and solely on my case. It cost me some of my savings, but I don’t care. It was worth it.
And now, I finally see the full picture. I know who is lying and who’s telling the truth. Relief floods through me. It all makes sense.
And maybe it wasn’t the outcome I wanted but I have to learn to accept the facts.
But first I need to tell Nathan who I am. If I want a future with him, I have to be honest. I can’t hide who I am anymore.
Heart pounding, I grab my phone from the coffee table. My fingers fly across the screen as I message him, urgency fueling every tap.
Me
I’m coming back to work tomorrow. x
Nathan
Fine.
Me
See you tomorrow. x
Nathan
Looking forward to it.
No kisses? That’s strange, he always puts kisses on the end of his messages.
Me
Everything okay? x