Page 123 of Breaking His Law

When all I have felt is ugly inside since he fired me.

I’ve never been fired from a job before.

Never loved anyone the way I love him.

“How are you?” he asks, his brow creasing, giving me a once over, but he doesn’t let me answer. “You’ve lost weight.” He tuts, his voice deep and low.

“I don’t have an appetite.” Heartbreak does strange things to your mind. I keep forgetting to eat. When I do, everything tastes bland and flavorless.

“Me neither,” he admits.

I can tell he’s not sleeping well either. The shadows beneath his eyes speak of sleepless nights and heavy burdens.

Fumbling with something inside the pocket of his jeans, he finally pulls out his phone, then holds it in front of my face. “My brothers told me you helped them with this.”

I nod, unable to speak as he scrolls down pages and pages of headlines about Julie andThe Golden Telegraphscandal.

“I wanted to ask you myself and personally thank you.”

“You don’t need to thank me. Julie hung herself.”

I hope she loses everything the same way I have.

I pick at the skin around my nails. “What are you doing here, Nathan?”

“I was invited.”

“Why?”

“Because I’m setting up a college and career prep center with the charity.”

“That’s you?” I overheard Martha and a few other trustees discussing it earlier.

He nods. “I’m donating laptops, implementing job interview workshops, and setting up a fund to help buy work clothes. I’m also starting a mentorship program for older foster youths aging out of the system. They’ll come work at the firm.”

“Nathan.” My sight blurs with tears, clouding my vision. “That’s so kind.”

“I don’t think I was very kind to you. I’m sorry I didn’t give you an opportunity to explain yourself, Arianna.”

“And I’m sorry I doubted your family.” The lump in my throat the size of a football swells until it spills over, hot tears tracing paths down my face. “I knew who you were that night at the bar, Nathan.” My voice trembles, thick with regret. “And I swear to you, it was never my intention to seduce ‘the boss’ just to get close to you. You have to believe that.”

I might have told myself that’s what I was doing at the time, but I was lying to myself. I liked him the minute I laid eyes on him.

I take a shaky breath, wrapping my arms around myself as if that could keep me from unraveling completely. “I liked you. God, I really liked you. And I hated myself for it. Because you were funny, handsome, and so damn smart. You weren’t the man I thought you were—you were better. And it terrified me because it wasn’t supposed to happen like this.”

I glance up at him, searching his face for anything—understanding, forgiveness, anything at all—but he’s unreadable. My chest tightens, but I push forward.

“When I started at Hart Law, I had the wrong intentions. And I owe you an apology for that. I am so sorry, Nathan. I never believed Julie. I knew her crash report was fabricated but you never gave me a chance to explain that day in the boardroom.” My voice cracks, and I swallow hard, trying to keep myself together.

“For as long as I can remember, I was so sure Kevin Taylor being acquitted was wrong. I was so sure of it. Because how could life be so cruel? How could it take away everyone I ever loved away from me and leave me completely alone in the world? I was fifteen, lost, and scared. My parents didn’t have much, but they made sure Riley and I had gymnastics. We had dreams, Nathan. We wanted to win competitions, compete in the Olympics, do it for them, to make them proud, because they were. That night… that night we were celebrating because we made the State Championships. And if we hadn’t, we wouldn’t have been out so late. I felt responsible. Like it was all my fault, and I was looking for answers, anything to shift the blame, I guess.”

A breath shudders out of me, and I tighten my arms that are wrapped around me as if desperately trying to contain the pain from spreading. “I will never forgive myself for doubting the verdict. For doubting Kevin. He saved me, and now I will never get the chance to thank him or your father for what they did to put Jean in place to take care of me.” My voice barely rises above a whisper. “And for that, I am so truly sorry.”

Tears sting my eyes like sharp needles piercing them as my throat burns, my words coming out forced and fast. “I’m sorry for breaking policy and stealing and photographing files from the archives. But most of all, I’m sorry for falling in love withyou. Because I know I hurt you in ways I will never be able to make up for.” I wipe at my face, but the tears keep coming and I stand up, shove my feet into my sandals and get ready to leave. “In the beginning, I wanted justice for my family. That was all that mattered. I thought the verdict on the lawsuit was wrong. ButIwas wrong. In the end, I fell in love with you. With your family. Because you’re good people doing incredible things for others.”

I take a step back, because I need to get out of here from fear I’ll shatter completely if I reach for him and he pulls away. “I just hope that what I did to help you bring Julie down was enough for you to see how truly sorry I am. But if you can never forgive me, I’ll understand.”

Willing him to believe me, willing him to see my heart laid bare before him, I apologize. “I’m sorry, Nathan,” I whisper. “I don’t know how many times I’ve said it, but even a million times wouldn’t be enough.” I turn away from him, breaking my heart all over again and walk out of his life.