Page 14 of Desperate Times

She said nothing. Instead, she nodded her head. I gave her her space back and walked away.

“Cool. You and lil mama take the bed.”

“I’m not putting you out of your bed, Jahsir. You can sleep with us.”

“Hell naw, I can’t risk rolling over on Scarlett. I'm good on the couch.”

“Okay.”

“What do you want to eat?”

“Nothing, I'm good.”

“Aye, what did I just say about push back and fighting? I know you’re hungry because you thought I was your food order back at that roach motel. Now, what do you want to eat? I can run out and grab you something, or lemme see what I got in the freezer.”

“Can you make me some noodles?” She asked shyly.

“Yoooo, you want the Jahsir Special, huh?” I asked proudly, rubbing my hands together.

“Don’t start flexing now.” She joked.

“I got you, Red. Why don’t you get cleaned up and settled? Gimme twenty minutes.”

Crimson smiled and nodded. For a moment, it felt like old times. The fact that she’d rather eat my noodles instead of eating something from her favorite restaurant warmed my heart. It was our go-to meal in the past. Crimson headed to the shower, and by the time she got out, Scarlett was waking up. Crimson gave her a quick wipe-down with a warm towel, oiled her body, and then changed her into a white sleeper with pink and yellow flowers. Crimson was sure she’d be back to sleep after her bottle, which she was.

Once the baby was settled, Crimson joined me on the couch. I tried my best to keep my eyes off of her. I didn’t want her to be more uncomfortable than she already was. But her nipples were pointing at me from underneath her Lilo and Stitch night shirt. Her hair was wrapped in her scarf with a couple of rebellious red strands caressing her neck. I wanted to suck her neck into a kiss, and trail the kisses down to her smooth, caramel legs. But we weren't there yet, she wasn’t there yet.

I handed her a bowl, and she thanked me. Her favorite was jumbo shrimp, fresh garlic, and fresh green onions set atop a pack of ramen chicken noodles. She ate the food so quickly that I felt bad for her. She declined when I asked her if she wanted more. Instead, she chose to call it a night. She moved from the couch to my bed, which was upstairs. Within moments, she was fast asleep.

I’d normally throw on a movie or something, but didn’t want to risk waking them. Instead, I took a shower, texted Rashad to let him know Crimson was good, then passed out.

Crimson

“Such a pretty girl. You got mama’s beauty, huh?”

I heard as I pulled myself from my slumber. After silently thanking God for another day, I reached for my phone. “11:30 am, “Fuck!” I screamed, jumping out of bed. I saw the scarf on the bed, then touched my hair. “My hair. It's a mess now. Why did you let me sleep so long? I’m late for work. Shit, shit SHIT!”

“Aye, watch your mouth in front of lil mama,” Jah stated as he put her back in her car seat.

“I need you to take me t-to work. I cannot lose this job.”

“Crimson, stop.” He grabbed my hand and turned me to face him. “You need to take a deep breath. You are not late for work. You called off, remember?”

“I did? Oh, right. I did, whew.” I sighed, embarrassed at the fiasco I had just caused. “I’m so tired. Man, I’m so used to just going and going.” Taking a deep breath, I collected myself and tucked my hair behind my ear. “How's my little angel? I'm so sorry Scarlett woke you.” I added, heading to her car seat.

“Red, chill.” Jah stopped me. “You just said you were tired. You can see her from where you are. Take a minute to take care of yourself first. What do you need? How can I help you?”

“I just realized I don’t have any clothes. All I have is the toothbrush and the pack of underwear I picked up from Family Dollar before Venus dropped me off at the motel.”

“It's cool. We can get all of that, you know I got you.”

“It's not cool, Jahsir. How did I end up with nothing to my name? Like, I just don’t understand. Do you know what my auntie said to me last night? She said I was triflin and always looking for handouts.”

“Well, we both know that's not true. You’re one of the hardest-working people I know,” he tried to reassure me.

“And then, my m-my mother.” I managed to choke out. “She said my mother was laying up for free. Was she insinuating my mother was a prostitute on top of her drug addiction? She’s supposed to be my family, and I’ve always felt unwelcome. I told you she didn’t like me. I feel… I feel so alone.”

“Come here, man,” Jah pulled me into him and wrapped his arms firmly around me. “You got me, always have, always will.”