Page 91 of Actually Yours

On the drive over to where my parents live, two suburbs away (not too close, but near enough that mum can drop around food regularly) I ask Spotify to play Taylor Swift, happy for it to pick which song is going to fit my mood. Today I’m feeling anxious, hopeful and in love, so I’m sure Taylor has something appropriate for every one of these emotions. When a song I’ve heard on the radio over the decades fills my car, I hum along. The lyrics once again capturing perfectly how I feel about Amelia. How she’s going to be the best thing to ever be mine.

Mine.

I park in front of the house where I grew up and take in a deep breath. I’m not sure how this will go. My parents are so protective of Robby, I can almost see them taking his side in this. Even if his side is ridiculous and without merit and will ultimately hurt me.They’ve spoilt him for his entire life. Why should this be any different?

“Jake?”

I startle at the knocking on my car door window, looking up to see my dad standing there, in his old dressing gown with the daily paper in his hand and a concerned look on his face.

Here goes nothing.

I open the door and let my dad take me into a tight hug.

“It’s early,” he frowns as he lets me go. “Come in, come in.”

I follow him along the well-manicured pathway to the front door, which is tastefully decorated with Christmas decorations. I’ve been so caught up in this Amelia situation, the Christmas spirit has passed me by.

“Jake?” My mum’s smiling face pokes around the corner from the kitchen. “Did we know you were coming over?”

“No, I just popped in for a quick visit.” My parents look at each other, doing their usual telepathic communication. “And I need to talk to you both about something important.”

My dad ushers me past him to where my mum has a cup of coffee waiting for me.How did she have that ready so quickly?

“Jake, you’re scaring us,” she says once we’re all seated at our well-worn kitchen table. “Is something wrong?”

How to answer this?“Yes and no.” I take a sip of coffee. “It’s complicated.”

“Why don’t you start at the beginning?”

A very good place to start.

“OK, I’ll do that.” And so I begin, telling them about that first night with Amelia and Robby and everything that has happened since. I emphasise that it was never, ever my intent to pursue Amelia and that where we’ve landed, where we almost are, results from timing and the two of us giving into our feelings. And that we never wanted to hurt Robby, not that I actually think he’s hurt.

“Well, maybe his pride is hurt,” I finish up, taking in a gulp of air.There, it’s out there. The whole sordid story.

“So, Amelia? Do you love her?” my mum asks, cutting through all the noise.

“I care for her a lot,” I answer carefully. “And I know we can be something real together.”

“Then what’s the problem?”

My mum and dad look so confused, I doubt myself.Did I not explain it properly?

“The big deal is that Robby is currently at home throwing a tantrum because he doesn’t want me with his ex-girlfriend.”

“So?” This is from my dad.

Huh? Not the reaction I was expecting.

“Well, I don’t want you to be upset with me, because I’m hurting Robby.”

Mum smiles at me. “You always were so protective of him.”

“We all were. We all are,” I point out with a meaningful look. They’re the reason he’s the way he is. An entitled brat.

“Yes, but you took on the role of protector of Robby from the minute he was born. We barely got a look in. It was always you who wanted the best for him. Wanted him to have more and do less. We just went along with it.”

That is not how I remember it. I tell them this with a frown.