Page 111 of Away We Go

I’ve gone from yachting to taking the bus, travelling with the team from Amsterdam to the small coastal town of Zandvoort for the first race back after the mid-season break, and I’m not sure what to make of it all.

Nicky had wanted me to travel with him, had argued with and cajoled me when I refused, but I’d been adamant, wanting to keep things as normal between us as possible while we’re working together. While I’m workingforhim.

Though, judging by the looks I’ve been getting all morning, I’m not sure if this is going to be possible.

“Don’t mind them,” Serena nudges me, drawing my attention back to her and away from the prying eyes at the back of the bus. “They’re just jealous.”

I shake my head. It’s not jealousy I’m seeing on their faces; it’s judgement. Their faces read as, ‘Ah so this is why she got this job’.

Or at least that’s how my insecurities are reading them.

“It’s just so strange, you know?” I sigh. “Having it announced to the world like that. We were barely together and then suddenly everyone knows.”

And by everyone, I mean that it feels like every single person in the world knows about us and has an opinion. And most of those opinions are harsh, and downright mean.

“You and Nicky want to be together, right?” Serena had been one of the first people I’d called to tell her the news. She’d been a good friend, refraining from yelling ‘I told you so’ for three whole minutes.

“Of course. But it’s difficult.”

After the story broke in the press and every gossip and tabloid news site wanted their piece of our pie, Nicky and I had spent our last days together on the yacht moored far away from any land or any people.

Other than Rachel, Captain Alex, our amazing chef and the deckhand, we didn’t see anyone for three whole days. It was only after we returned that we copped the full brunt of what people were thinking and saying about our newfound relationship. And sadly enough, it seems the masses aren’t fans of our coupling.

“It will be old news soon enough.”

I nod. “Do you think Nate has any more scandals lined up to take the heat off us?”

She giggles and pats my arm. “Just don’t read the comments.”

“Believe me, I don’t. I learnt that the hard way.”

When we’d first come back to land, and posted a joint statement hard launching our relationship, I’d made the grave error of perusing some of the commentary out there about our budding romance.

And what I’d read left me wanting to crawl into a hole and hide.

She’s not even pretty. What does he see in her?

She’s got the body of a teenage boy. Ew.

That hair colour is fake for sure.

It was like the internet trolls took every mean thing Troy had ever said about me, every terrible thing I’d ever thought about myself, and published it for the world to see. It’s enough to have my dormant doubts and insecurities crashing back to the surface and even now, when I’m not looking at them, these comments are weighing on my mind.

“You know that social media is a cesspool for people who just want to hate for the sake of it. Nothing they say about you is remotely true. You know that, right?”

I nod, trying to let Serena’s words silence all the others. “Yeah, I know. I just wish it wasn’t so awful. That being with Nicky didn’t come with a side of hurtful commentary.”

She links her arm through mine and squeezes me to her. “It’ll get better. I promise.”

I know she can’t possibly promise such a thing, but I choose to believe her.

“Thanks.”

Blotting the haters from my mind, I lean back and close my eyes, focusing on the weekend ahead.

Nicky had said it would not be easy. But as my confidence takes one hit after another, I never imagined it was going to be this hard, either.

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