Page 93 of The River Is Waiting

“All right then, my friend. Go forth and prosper.” Quick handshake. Big, straight teeth. He’s one of those people who look creepy when they smile.

“Yeah, okay. Thanks.”

I’m guessing neither one of us can wait for me to get out of there, but I can’t chalk this up to being a total waste of time. He’s put me at ease about the hard-on. And more important, he’s going to get me that prescription, which, this time, I’ll be taking under controlled circumstances,not because I’m craving it. Thank God that obsession has left me. And I’m not really breaking the promise I made to Emily before I came here. Well, I am and I’m not. It’s just a port in the storm—a way to survive the last months of my bid here before, for better or worse, I’m free. I’m never going to tell her that I was sexually assaulted and she doesn’t need to know that I’m going to get past it with the help of a low-dose benzo either. It’s all good.

CHAPTER THIRTY-SIX

December 2019 to January 2020

Days 872–901 of 1,095

I’m surprised when Aliyah Jackson, the counselor-supervisor who got Solomon transferred, calls me into her office. I like the orange and blue beads she’s decorated her dreads with. At this place, I’m always grateful for color. “Two things,” she says. “First of all, I’d been hearing so much about your mural that I went over to the library to check it out. Awesome job, Corby. Congratulations.”

I thank her. Ask her what the other thing is.

“It’s good news,” she says. “The governor’s going to be rolling out a new initiative after the holidays. He wants to bring down the numbers at state prisons, so they’re releasing some inmates earlier than scheduled—fifty or so of the guys here. Merry Christmas, Corby. It looks like you’ll be going home in February.”

I’m stunned. “What? Six months early?”

“I don’t have a date yet, but your name is on the list. What did the judge give you? I haven’t looked it up yet.”

“Five years suspended after three, plus three years’ probation, as long as I don’t screw up.”

“I don’t see that happening. You’ve done well in here, and because of the hiring freeze, the caseloads for probation officers have gotten ridiculous.You’ll probably just have to report once or twice a month.… I’m having trouble reading you, Corby. What are you thinking?”

“Well, I’m glad. But when you say I’m going home, I’m not sure where home is going to be. Back with my wife and our daughter is what I’m hoping for, but it’s up in the air. She went to see a divorce lawyer the first year I was in here, but she never followed through.”

“So that’s a hopeful sign, right?”

“Maybe.” And then there’s the Klonopin. I’ll need to wean myself off it earlier now. Not really a problem.

“Either way, your residence postprison has to be established before they let you out. So this early release will have to set something in motion. Maybe a reconciliation.”

“I hope so.”

Later that day, when I call Mom with the news, she starts to cry. Says she’s just as happy for Maisie as she is for me.

“And if Emily lets me come back home, we’ll be able to avoid all that visitation stuff. What do you think the chances of that happening are?”

Silence on her end for three or four seconds. Then she says she doesn’t know. “Just don’t count your chickens before they hatch, sweetheart.”

Why’s she saying that? “Do you know something I don’t?”

“No, no. Emily and I don’t discuss what happened in the past or what’s going to happen. That’s up to you two to figure out. The most important thing is that you’ll finally be out of there and that you and Maisie will—”

Securus cuts us off.

I try Emily’s number, which is stupid because she’s going to still be at work.

“Hello?”

Oh. Sheishome.

The canned spiel kicks in:This call originates from a Connecticut Correctional facility. Press one to accept the charges.…

Which she does. “No, Maisie’s not sick,” she says. “She’s still at school.The water heater sprung a leak and I had to be here when they came to replace it. They’re working on it now.”

I give her the news that I’m getting out six months earlier than I thought, and that my residency has to be established before they release me. “I don’t want to pressure you, Em, but it’s more urgent now.” When she asks me what the exact date is, I tell her I don’t know yet. Sometime in February. “My counselor’s going to let me know, but at the rate things happen around here, it could be—”

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