Page 42 of Bar Down

The three of us have been walking around for the last half hour, after getting coffee and pastries at a nearby cafe. From the pier, I can see the ferris wheel, which is smaller than I expected, but still impressive. When Ed tells me one of the gondolas has a sauna, I am blown away. A sauna on a ferris wheel? How cool is that?

I’m reluctant to leave the sailboats, but Eli says, “This isn’t the last you’ll see of them, I promise.”

So we keep walking until we get to one of the tram stations. I don’t know why I’m so excited about public transportation of all things, it’s not like we didn’t have trains in Boston growing up, but my dad always had a driver take me to school and practice, so I never really got to experience it. And while we have buses in Grand Marquee, it’s such a small city that I don’t really need to ride the bus.

The tram is more modern looking than I expected, each seat attached to a swivel and posted in front of a small table. There are even a few TVs located above the large windows but I pay them no mind, looking at the buildings as we pass them by. Helsinki has an interesting architecture and history from what I’ve seen so far. Older buildings made of colorful red bricks—like cathedrals—look like they’re straight out of a history textbook, while the newer buildings have a more modern, minimalistic look to them. It’s such a stark contrast, but somehow it works.

Eli and Ed do their best to give me a rundown of what everything is, but there’s so much to see and learn about, that we start looking up architecture tours for tomorrow before we head back to their house. While Ed is spending the night with a friend tonight, Eli and I got a hotel room. I’m hoping we can also celebrate his birthday today in a fun way, with a bed that’s not directly above his parents’ room.

We end up seeing two museums—one of art and one of history—and by the time we are done it’s already evening. Eli takes me and Ed to one of his favorite restaurants with outdoor seating by the water. This gives me a great view of the sailboats, so I’m extra happy.

When Ed goes to the restroom, I place my hand on Eli’s thigh under the table and lean in just a little. “Thank you, for today. I’ve had a lot of fun.”

“Are you sure? I didn’t bore you with all the history and museums?”

“Are you kidding? This is your home. I want to know all about it! Plus it’s your birthday, so we had to celebrate you in your own way.”

Eli’s smile is big and I spot some pink in his cheeks. I want to kiss him so badly, but instead I squeeze his thigh again.

“I know you didn’t want to have a big birthday celebration, so I didn’t get you a present, but there’s plenty of things we can do later to make it up to you,” I say, wiggling my eyebrows suggestively.

“I have you here with me, I don’t need anything else.” Eli’s serious gaze is piercing and I can’t fucking wait to get to the hotel. My hand twitches, wanting to move higher up, but I let go when I see Ed walking back to the table.

“Just got a text from my friend, he said there’s a new club nearby and I think I’d want to go. What do you guys think?”

“No, thank you,” Eli says before I can reply, and I look at him from the corner of my eye. His grip is tight on his fork and he’s digging into his appetizer like it personally offended him. Ed gives me a questioning look but I just shrug. This isn’t my business, even though I have an inkling as to why Eli doesn’t want me around clubs.

The conversation moves to hockey and I zone out, like I do every time the topic comes up recently. I’m too much in my head about it and I can’t shake off the disappointment my dad expressed after the Calder Cup. I keep my eyes on the sailboats while Eli gives Ed advice and tips on training.

When I return to the conversation, Ed is looking a little bored and chastised. The poor kid just wants to have a little fun with his brother and instead is getting a lecture.

When the waitress brings our meal, I order a bottle of champagne for the table and change the topic to something more lively.

“So Ed, what fun plans do you have for the summer?”

Ed perks up and says, “I have tickets to a music festival at the end of August. It’s a huge line up of DJs but also some popular pop artists. Wait, do you guys wanna come? I could totally find some tickets.”

“We’re returning to the States before then,” Eli says, and I can’t figure out his tone. Is he disappointed that we’re not staying longer? Or is something else bothering him?

“Oh, right. Well, maybe I can save some money and come visit you next summer?” Ed asks shyly.

Eli looks startled for a moment. “That would be nice,” he responds with a smile.

We spendhours at the restaurant, ordering more wine and dessert, and for the first time in a long time I think I’m reallyhappy. We part ways with Ed, who is meeting up with his friend, and Eli and I head over to the hotel. I’m feeling buzzed and happy but some of that happiness dims when I get a text from my dad.

Have you started training? You better not be wasting time partying god knows where.

My initial reaction is to throw my phone away and go party, just like he expects me to. But I try to put him out of my mind. Why should I still give a shit about what he thinks of me and my career?

yep

I lie and put my phone away right as we get to the hotel.

“Everything okay?” Eli asks.

“Fine.” What’s one more lie?

As soon as the elevator doors close, Eli takes hold of my hand and threads his fingers through mine. He doesn’t let go, not even while he opens the door to our room, not while he backs me up against the wall, not as he unbuttons my shirt and my pants, and not as he reaches into my boxers and makes me see stars.

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