Page 50 of Bar Down

“Hey!” I smile at him in the hopes he doesn’t hate me for how I spoke to him earlier and ignored him.

“Eli, you’re actually here,” he says, startled.

Ouch, okay. I deserve that.

Wincing, I say, “Heylapsi, I’m sorry about earlier. About everything actually. I should have been trying harder to connect with you over things that are not hockey related.”

He looks down at his shoes and at this moment, even though he’s the same height as me, he does look like the little kid I remember from four years ago, before I left home and moved to my own apartment, and before I moved to America.

“It’s fine, just don’t take it out on Ash. He didn’t do anything wrong,” he says, watching me with his keen blue eyes.

Before I can reply and subtly ask if he suspects something between us, he says, “Ash is your family too. I can tell he’s the one you turn to when we can’t be there for you. I’m glad you found him. You seem happier around him, so don't let him go.”

I take a shaky breath and bring him in for a hug, holding tight. “When did you get so wise, kid?”

“Recently,” he jokes.

Ash comes back with a tray of shots and even though I hate crowds and I hate the too loud noises of the party, when I’m with my family, I can tune it all out. They matter to me, so I’m going to try harder to let go of my self-imposed rules and try not to give a shit about what others might think of me, or how they might see me.

We drink and party the whole night and end up coming home wasted. The three of us are clamoring through the kitchen looking for food when my parents emerge from their room, ready for the day.

“Shit, what time is it?” Ed whisper-yells, like we’re still sneaking around.

My dad laughs but he moves into the kitchen and starts setting up the dining table. My mom is shaking her head at us, but she’s smiling so I know she’s not mad about us being drunk and giggling in her kitchen. “It’s 6 a.m. Did you boys party all night?”

“Yes,” the three of us say in unison.

“Well, how was it?” dad asks.

Ash sighs dreamily, dropping into one of the chairs and says, “Sailboats are fucking cool, Mr. Kalias.”

“That they are.” My dad gets the orange juice out of the fridge and pours us each a glass as my mom starts on breakfast.

We sit at the table, reliving the night before, and even though we’re still kinda drunk, my parents listen with rapt attention, asking us all about it.

“I think I made out with a girl,” Ed says, eyes squinting like he’s trying to picture her. I can’t help but laugh, which then turns into a fit of giggles. I try to smother them with my hand, but that just makes me chuckle more.

“What’s so funny?” he says, looking all offended.

“Are you sure it wasn’t a mop? You were so drunk you couldn’t tell the difference.”

Ash laughs along with me and Ed punches me in the shoulder.

“It was a girl, I swear.”

“You’re right, it was that flirty blond. I saw you two making out,” Ash supplies and Edvin beams proudly.

“Yeah, she was hot,” he says right as my mom places a big platter of eggs, bacon, and toast in front of us and then smacks Ed across the head for his comment.

“No objectifying women at my table, young man.”

“Sounds like you boys had a fun night,” my dad says. “Ash, what happened to your hand?”

Ash looks down like he’s seeing the bandage for the first time and laughs. “Oh yeah, I almost forgot about it. I broke a glass and—you know—your son makes an excellent caretaker, if I do say so myself.” He waves his right arm around before putting it around my shoulder and bringing me close.

I give a short laugh and turn towards him, ready to make a joke, and that’s when I panic. Because Ash grabs the side of my face with his free hand, like he’s about to?—

Ash

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