Page 38 of Delay of Game

Megan chokes on a laugh and her ring-clad fingers land on my shoulders, shaking me a little. “I meant be careful with your heart and feelings, but good to know, you little nympho.”

“I am careful,” I say, a touch defensively.

“Okay,” Megan nods, a small dimple popping in her angular face.

“Seriously,” I say, peeking around her, making sure no kids are in sight. “I’ve been in love with him since I was seventeen, I think I know my own feelings.”

“I’m not saying you don’t. Just—” She hesitates briefly, tilting her head in thought. “You, my friend, like to wear your heart on your sleeve and I just don’t want anyone to take advantage ofthat. I’m sure Jordan is lovely, and I want you both to be happy. Just make sure you two are on the same page about what this is.”

I ponder her advice, knowing she’s never led me astray, and I realize that she does have a point. Jordan has never brought up the fact that we are a couple now. He hasn’t labeled us in any way, not even as a hookup.

“I guess you’re right,” I say, taking a seat and taking one more look at my black phone screen before the bell goes off again.

“Al, I love you. I’m sure everything is fine, and I’m glad you finally got your dream guy. I can’t wait to meet him,” Megan says, retreating to the door and giving me a wink.

Right. If only my dream guy would answer the phone, I would love to talk about where we stand.

CHAPTER 13

Three Years Ago – April

Jordan

I blink backtears and push myself to run another mile. I’ve done nothing but run myself into the ground on this treadmill all morning, ever since Coach Brian called to give me the news.

I’m being traded to another AHL team in Texas.

Traded.

I don’t know what I’m supposed to feel, but I’m numb to it all. It doesn’t feel real. It can’t be real. Not when I’ve given this team everything for the last seven years. The Manticores have been my home since that day when I showed up to training camp late and scared shitless of my own future. If it hadn’t been for Alex and Robbie, who knows where I would have ended up. They were like my brothers—we did everything together, from working out, to going to brunch together, to spending late summer nights at the cabin around a fire pit.

It was a shock to learn that Alex requested a trade and followed his girlfriend to Quebec, but at least I still had Robbie.And then Eli and Ash came along, and they quickly wormed their way into my life too. But now, Robbie’s retired, and I’m getting traded, and everything is such a fucking mess. I can’t help but ask myself what happened? How did I get here?

I used to be the one to get called up to the NHL whenever there was a need, but not this year. I’ve made some good defensive moves, but my game has been off. I’m not at my best, and somehow I lost track of that.

Is it my anxiety?

Is it the stress?

Is it Alice?

I wince at that last thought and press the cooldown button on the treadmill. I shut my eyes tight and try not to think about the fact that I’ll have to confront her at some point today and break the news.

I can’t help but feel like I’ve failed everyone—my friends and the team for not being a good enough player to the point they had to trade me; Alice, for starting something only for us to have to call it quits; and myself, for not giving it my all.

The cold shower at the gym is eye-opening, but I choose to wallow in my self-pity a moment longer. I know exactly how I got here.I wasn’t good enough.

And I can’t keep dwelling on the past. I need to look forward and move on. As soon as I’m out of the gym and in my car, I call my sister and tell her everything.

“Jordan, honey. Hold on a minute, what do you mean you want to leave tomorrow?” she says gently, like I’m a spooked animal.

“I can’t do it, Tangy. I can’t stick around until next season, watching my friends go on without me, while I have nothing left here.”

“Ouch, that’s not fair. You have me,” she says, and I can hear the sadness in her voice. I’m hurting her too, but I can’t fuckingstay another minute here. “You have your nieces who love you and look up to you. And what about Alice?”

I close my eyes and rest my head against the steering wheel. I don’t want to think about Alice right now.

“She won’t want to be with a loser who’s about to move thousands of miles away.”