Page 20 of Speak

That captures my attention but before I can ask what he means by that; there’s a knock at the door and I’m surprised to see his son gracing us. I get up and greet him but not before I see the face they make at each other, like a secret between them. They plaster a silicone smile on their faces. The hardness of the chair I’m sitting on and their fake smiles has made me very aware my time here is up. “I’ll figure something out, Whitmore.”

“Thank you, Maverick. I appreciate you coming here and letting me know. Just keep me up to date on the route you choose to take.”

I nod, shake Junior’s hand again as I take my leave.

Still having thirty minutes on my lunch hour, I decide to go to the dining hall to get something from the salad bar and finish eating before my next class. Waiting my turn in line, I notice Raven sitting next to Jonas and two other students, football players to be exact. The Prescott Twins. They make jokes as she blankly stares out onto the quad. She doesn’t even crack a smile; there’s food on her fork but she mindlessly pushes it around, looking completely uninterested in absolutely everything, lost in thought or in a trance.

If she were my age, or not a student, I’d be doing what I could to run my fingers along her tattoo, to ask her the philosophy of her Lotus flowers and spider lilies. I’d trace the woven vines that go from her inner ankle, up her leg and up her thigh, pretend I don’t feel the scar tissue she most likely has under it, and beg her to tell me. I bet her voice is seasoned, husky and low.

Then, as though she can feel me watching her, she turns her head, like a possessed doll deadpanning and meets my gaze. My heart drops when those beautiful twin drops of warm cinnamon whiskey look at me behind thick black lashes. Crimson highlights the tops of her cheeks, her bashfulness making my stomach flip and my balls draw up except Jonas, the acutely attuned fucker, turns to seewhat she’s staring at. He narrows his eyes at me and puts his hand on her thigh. On that very tattoo I want to touch. Either in a way to ground her or show his possession of her, I don’t know yet. Our connection snaps and her eyes drop and I continue on to select the ingredients for my salad.

I’m back in my classroom, tearing into my salad, unable to forget the flash of…somethingin Miss Monroe’s eyes. A hunger there. Fierce. Even though she had food in front of her, Miss Monroe was ravenous for something else entirely.

A part of me hoped I was the one to figure out what exactly she was hungry for.

The deplorable part that is man and Neanderthal hopes it’s me.

Chapter Five

Raven.

My phone only rings when Axel FaceTime’s or texts.

Sofia, my mother, stopped calling or texting years ago. John rarely ever did before the accident, so, you know. I didn’t exactly expect him to either.

The friends I had made previously stopped calling or texting when they realized I was no longer mean, bitchy,Ray. I mean, they tried. For the first few weeks after I woke up in the ICU and then I was moved down to the VIP area of the hospital, they would visit. But when they realized I wouldn’t laugh with them the way I used to when they’d gossip and talk shit about the other girls we went to school with, or have a snarky sarcastic remark, they’d stop talking, too. At one point, it was like they were afraid to laugh in front of me.

I knew I made them uncomfortable.

For the longest, I just didn’t have it in me to care and then when I did miss them… they had already moved on. Junior year. Then Senior year. Then Ashliegh married Thadd like she always said she would. Taylor moved to France where she helps her mother run her fashion line there. Brina moved to New York, working in her daddy’s law firm. I accidentally liked her picture once on Instagram and she ended up direct messaging me.

Hey… Miss you.

I stared and cried at the message.

They’d all moved on… and I was stuck at Lorne Wood watching them be their best from a fucking cheap tablet I was given one hour access to every other day. And then I watched them from my phone when I was finally given mine back during house visits.

The day Brina messaged me, I went through every single picture of me where my hair was all brown. Where I didn’t have a scar on my temple or my leg the best plastic surgeons couldn’t fix. Where I didn’t have a forced smile on my face.

It was the first time I cried, sobs that made my entire body shake, sobs that were so silent, with tears so wild and flowing so freely, the front of my shirt was wet. I cried for such a long time that Doctor Archer had to sedate me because I threw the tablet at him.

I hadn’t meant to.

I wanted to show him that Brina had messaged me. That shemissedme. She had moved on with her life, living fabulously in a penthouse in Manhattan while I was bouncing between a mental hospital and my parent’s lonely, empty mansion.

And she missed me.

Archer called Axel, and requested we do something therapeutic while I was at home. When Axel suggested defensive training, I leapt into his lap and hugged him to me, snuggling him so closely, he chuckled and rasped out he couldn’t breathe. Doctor Archer simply smiled and nodded. But behind those smokey eyes of his, something flashed when I had practically straddled my brother.

A delusional piece of me hoped it was jealousy.

“There’s my favorite sister.” Axel coos.

I roll my eyes but I’m beaming on the inside. It’s so great to not only see his face but hear his voice. I woke up to a gloomy, misty morning, the kind I adore, but thankfully, my first class isn’t until ten.

“Where are you taking me?” He jokes.

I squint due to the sun peeking behind a heavy cloud in my eyes and turn the camera to the circle-shaped library looming ahead.

---