Page 97 of Speak

I’m suddenly not hungry whatsoever anymore. It feels like the closer I get to finding out who the group of people were that attacked me for their initiation are, it’s like starting at square one all over again. I keep taking a step forward and thrown four steps back.

This is exhausting.

Chapter Twenty-Three

Raven.

Tuesday afternoon after my last class, I head to the library to get a book on Charles Cullen.

Jonas is outside, getting us our espressos since we’re going to need the caffeine to go to the wake later. I’m in the biography section when two very familiar toned arms wrap around my waist, then lower onto my hips. His nose rubs along the shell of my ear, his breath is warm and it sends shivers everywhere. “Is this where you hide?”

I turn to face him, my tormentor, whose peridot gaze lingers on my lips before meeting my eyes. Fuck he smells so fucking good. I take a step backward and my spine hits the shelves. His hands drop to my thighs, reaching lower to the hem of my skirt, pulling it up as though we’re not in public. Warmth pools between my thighs at the thought of being caught with my professor’s hands under my skirt.

“I… ordered that book we were reading at your lake house. It’s…interestingto say the least.”

I nod once. Of course it is, it’s about a five-hundred-year-old vampire queen that finally gives in to fate and fucks all of her mates.

He kisses just below my ear, we’re so close, the low thrum of students walking and studying just two stories below… fuck, if he moved his fingers just a little higher… “I worried about you.” He sighs, “I’venever worried for someone before, Siren… what are you doing to me? Hmm?”

He licks, nipping at my skin, his fingertips tracing small circles on my outer thighs - I hear footsteps coming so I shake my head at him to shut him up and push him a little. Even through the fabric of his button-down his skin is hot. It’s so hot and I want to touch him without it. But not here. Not now.

Kinsley MacNamara runs past us, all golden hair, and rays of sunshine. Her skirt is hiked up and the top three buttons of her shirt are unbuttoned. “Oh! Professor Harrington, you’re still here, good. I had a few questions about the debate?” She flirts with a high-pitched voice that sounds like nails on a chalkboard.

Ugh.

“It’s adebateKinsley.” He answers in a sharp, annoyed tone.

Her eyes find mine and she smiles wickedly. “What are you doing here,mute? God, go be creepy somewhere else.” So much for being a ray of fucking sunshine. “Oh, unless this is where you haunt?”

“Kinsley! Do not speak to her like that.”

She giggles, ignoring him. “My mother said your own mother said you’re just like a creepy little broken doll. Always staring. You freak your own family out so much Sofia doesn’t even want to be seen with you in public.”

I know. I take a step toward her, extending my arm and… grab the book I was looking for from behind her.

“Raven, I-"

“She’s a lost cause, professor. Even her brother thinks so. Anyway-"

I leave them behind and find Jonas waiting for me downstairs. “You okay, baby?”

I peek up at the third floor to see Maverick glaring down at me. I fix my focus back to Jonas, nod, smile, tip on my toes and give him a simple kiss.

“Sofia doesn’t even want to be seen with you in public.”

I let the comment slide off my shoulders. I don’t have time to dwell on things I already know.

After I check out the biography I need, we go to our separate dorms, which he then comes into mine, fucks me in the shower, andwe get ready for the wake together, only for him to try to fuck me in my little black romper with long lace sleeves and a deep V neckline. I purchased it a long time ago because it had secret pockets sown in.

“I’m going to burn this thing. I hate it. It’s a goddamn cockblock.” I smile and get on my knees for him instead. “Fuck, I love you.”

He finishes just in time as Axel knocks on my door when I’m refreshing my lipstick. I grab my double-breasted cloak overcoat that hides my hands. While Jonas is greeting Axel, I put a balaclava in my pocket. Kinsley’s comment had given me an idea.

“Creepy little doll… Ghost… Spooks… Specter… Mute.”

The driver opens the door to the Lincoln Limousine and I almost fall on my ass when I see John and Sofia Monroe waiting for us. She’s as beautiful as ever, my mother. Stark green eyes and flawless skin. Looking at her breaks my heart because when she looks at me… her eyes don’t shine like they used to. Now she looks at me with an indifference like I am a ghost.

But I’myourghost, mama. I’myourmuñequita, mama. Your doll. Remember? Remember when I’d dress up in your closet and prance around in your shoes that were too big for me and you would do my makeup so we could hide from papa a little longer? Mama, por favor! I want to scream.

---