Page 106 of My Boss

“Thanks.” Jan takes out plastic boxes with different-color lids from the cabinet and sets one next to the other on the countertop.

I’m about to tell him it wasn’t a compliment, but again I’m stopped in my tracks. I watch in disbelief as Jan counts out the slices of yellow cheese and distributes them equally into the containers. Only now do I notice that each lid is labeled with the day of the week.

“What are you doing?” I ask.

“I am organizing our supplies for the next three days.”

“But the store is only two miles or so away. If we run out of something, we can simply go to the store.”

“I would prefer to know ahead of time when we will run out of food.”

“Does this mean I can’t eat more than four slices of cold cuts a day?”

“Not at all. Whenever you run out of stock for the day, replenish it from the next day’s box and label it with the current number of slices.”

My jaw drops. At first, I think Jan is making fun of me, but when he goes back to separating more slices, it dawns on me that he is dead serious.

I watch him as he carefully arranges the food in containers, then sets them evenly in the refrigerator. In doing so, he is so focused and sweetly abnormal that he melts my heart.

“Jan, what if I ate all our supplies now?” I pull myself up and sit on the countertop.

“Why would you do that since we are going to have lunch in an hour?” He glances at his watch. “Correction, dinner.”

“I’m hungry right now. What would you do if I ate the three days’ worth of food today?”

“I would prepare stomach drops, heartburn pills and a bowl for you.”

“Ha ha ha. And you said you couldn’t make a joke.”

“Because I can’t. But I’m glad I managed to amuse you.” He throws the vegetables into the sink, pulls up his sleeves, turns onthe water and starts scrubbing the carrots with a brush, so hard that I feel sorry for the poor things.

At least with Jan, I won’t catchEscherichia coli, that’s for sure.

“OK, I’ll start on the dough.” I jump off the countertop. “Where do you keep the mixer?”

“The first cabinet to the right of the oven, second shelf from the top.”

“Row three, seat four,” I add in the same tone of voice.

“What?” He lifts his gaze, confused.

He looks sweet. I smile and it occurs to me that I really have lost it. Jan is a freak like no other, and something tells me that I’ll find this out more than once in the coming days. But instead of running like hell, I feel like staying with him and getting to know more of his quirks.

“Nothing, Jan. Another joke, but not very funny.” I walk up to him and put my hand on his shoulder. He shudders, but this time more lightly than last time. “Can I kiss you?” I look into his eyes.

He frowns.

“Now?”

“Yes.”

“I’m busy, and you were hungry.”

“And I still am. It will just be a quick kiss.” I take his face in my hands and kiss him on the lips.

Jan is standing still, holding the brush and carrot in his hands, looking questioningly into my eyes as if he doesn’t understand why I’m actually kissing him when we were supposed to be preparing food.

“Enough.” I tear myself away from his lips. “We’ll save the rest for an evening by the fireplace on the fluffy white carpet.”

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