Page 86 of Heart on Ice

“Totally understandable,” Kimberly adds.

“I can’t believe you never told me,” Harper says, sounding hurt.

“I was mortified. I couldn’t believe I let him kiss me. I wanted to forget it ever happened.”

“Until I showed up on your doorstep with a runaway groom.” Harper gasps. I nod. “And I told you it would be a great idea. Thinking that you would just magically iron out your differences, but you were struggling. I’m so sorry, Issy.”

“Not your fault. You were right, though. I needed to talk through what happened all those years ago because it changed me, and not for the better when it came to relationships. There was a lot of anger that I had against him, and it wasn’t healthy to hold on to it, especially after all these years,” I explain to the group.

“And what about now?” Meadow asks.

“Confusion,” I answer honestly.

“Because you guys reconnected?” Kimberly asks. I nod. The girls squeal.

“He asked me to take a chance on him. I kind of turned him down.” My friends gasp. “All because I’m scared. What if he breaks my heart again?”

“Every relationship is a leap of faith, Issy. Do you miss him since he’s moved out?” Camryn asks.

“Yes. He used to cook for me every night and give me foot rubs while we watched sport together,” I confess.

“Girl.” Meadow looks at me as if I’ve lost my mind.

“I know when I say it out loud, he sounds perfect. In The Hamptons, I drunkenly told him I’ve been hungry since he left.”

“I bet you have,” Harper teases which makes me laugh.

“He’s been sending me home-cooked dinners every day to my home and delivering breakfast to the office after his morning runs.” The girls ooh and ahh over that. “We’ve been texting every night since, and now I don’t know how I feel.”

“Do you have feelings for him?” Meadow asks.

“Yes,” I answer honestly.

“Is it love?” Kimberly pushes.

“Maybe,” I confess.

“Would you be jealous if he started dating someone else?” Harper asks. “Because I think I would die seeing Felix with someone else. It would rip my heart out.”

“I think I would feel the same,” I tell her. Harper gives me a knowing, sad smile telling me she gets it.

“But you’re just fearful he could cheat on you again?” Camryn asks.

“Yes.”

“And that’s your only worry?” Camryn questions.

“Yes.”

“Has he done anything that would make you feel like he would cheat again? Like checked out girls. Gotten a girl’s number?” Camryn continues to ask.

“He was not in the least interested in those four girls that Sam brought over when we were at the club,” Kimberly adds.

That’s true, he looked uncomfortable. “But was that because I was there?” My friends all look at me as if that question is ridiculous. “I’m overthinking this.”

“We like to overthink things.” Harper chuckles. Hope this is helping her.

“Do you want a second chance with Pierre? Can you see a future with him now that he is permanently in New York?” Kimberly asks me.

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