Page 74 of Resist

Edith raised her brows, biting her cheek. “I’d seriously hope not, but I told you that girl was bad news. And when she wants something, she willdestroyanything that gets in her way.”

“She sounds like a psychopath.”

Edith shrugged her shoulders. “I’m no therapist, but the girl’s got major issues.”

I closed my eyes, moaning. “Why does this crap always happen to me? It’s like I’m a magnet for crazy people!”

“You said it, not me. I told you you needed therapy.”

I rolled my eyes at her. “You could at leasttryto be useful here.”

She chuckled. “Look, it’s gonna be fine. Calista’s going to be more focused on keeping her own ass alive. I definitely don’t think she’s going to protectyouat all costs like she’s supposed to, but I highly doubt she’s going to focus on scheming some way of killing you. Besides, you’ve got the rest of us. Jim’s still there to watch your every move, and you know Matias, Wes, and I have your back. So I wouldn’t worry about it.”

Easy forherto say, but her point was still a valid one. I didn’t have the luxury of worrying about Blondie. The mission was bad enough. I just had to stay focused on that. “I guess you’re right.”

“Hey, totally changing the subject here, but what is the deal with you, Matias, and Wes?”

I groaned, rolling my eyes into the back of my head. “I don’t even know. I haven’t been able to talk to Matias at all. And things between Wes and I…” I halted. The memory of being drunk and curled up on my bed with him fluttered through my mind,sending my heart into an erratic beat. I wasn’t sure if I wanted Edith to know about that. Something about it seemed way too private for me to gossip about. Plus, I wasn’t entirely convinced the whole thing had happened either.

“Yeess…?” She leaned forward hungrily.

“It’s just…it’s just weird.”

“Weird how?” She was fishing.

“I don’t know how to explain it, but I just feel…” What? What did I feel? How do you explain something when you don’t even know what that something is?

Once upon a time, I feared Wes, but I was drawn to him because he looked like Chase. But then I saw him forhim. For the unique man that he was, with all his flaws and all his strengths. And the more I saw of him, the more I understood the complexity of the person who stood before me. The deeper I dove into those layers, the more I realized Wes was a tortured hero, always fighting to do the right thing, making the hard choices, but never getting the credit. Hell, he didn’t evenwantthe credit. He shrugged it off with his awful attitude and an air of indifference. But I knew better.

I knew that underneath that stoic mask was a tortured soul just needing to be loved. In many ways, Wes and I were the same. But he was afraid…afraid to love and be loved in return. That’s where we differed. I craved acceptance, craved knowing that I was worthy of being loved. I wanted it desperately. But Wes…it’s what heneeded, but he was too afraid to accept it.

“Hello!Earth to Mara… Don’t leave a girl hanging now.”

I blinked. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to space out.”

“Yeah, no shit. And you left me hanging here waiting for you to profess your endless love for Wes.”

“What?No!” There wasnoway. There were a lot of confusing emotions in there, but love was not one of them.

Edith rolled her eyes with a groan. “God, you’re going to drive me crazy. I’m serious now…you need therapy. How is it you can never put this crap together yourself, huh? How can you not see what’s right in front of you?”

I waved her off. “Stop, Edith. It’s not like that.” Something niggled inside of me. The pit of my stomach swirled.

“Whatever, newbie. I can’t even deal with you right now. If you can’t figure out what’s going on in your own head, then that’s your problem—I don’t get paid nearly enough to help you untangle your rat’s nest of a brain.” With a tilt of her head, she narrowed her gaze at me. “It’s like you’retryingto be dense or something.”

“I am not—”

“Yes, you are!” she pushed back. “You’re totally trying to squelch out anything you feel for Wes, but I don’t understand why. You’re gettingmarried, so why do you keep stamping out any emotions you have for him?”

“That’s not true.” I argued.But is it true?“Wes and I are just friends stuck in a marriage neither one of us wants—”

“That’s BS, Mara. That’s BS and you know it,” she snapped back at me. “When you told me about Sasha promising you to him, I believed it then. I believed you hadsomefeelings for Wes, but that what you felt for Matias was stronger. But it’s all different now.”

“Nothing has changed.”Do I really believe that?

“Baloney!Everythinghas changed. Don’t think I didn’t see that exchange at the mission meeting. I was in the audience, Mara. I watched as you almost lost your shit in front of everyone. And you know what else I saw? I saw a guy who has kept everyone at arm’s length, who wears afuck-youattitude like it’s his Sunday’s best, reveal his entire hand. The way he looked at you, the way his face changed into this total look of concern. The way he brought you close to him and whispered in your ear. Itwas all on full display, girl. And when you turned to face him—BAM! I saw it in you too. It all changed. I know I argued with you about getting promised, but once I saw that exchange, I changed my mind.”

Holy mother…Was that what it looked like to everyone? Was she right? I opened my mouth to say something, to push back, but Edith wasn’t finished.

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