Page 35 of Chrome

“Thank you. I’ll be down in a minute.” She left my room and I felt like everything I said to her in the car was heard.

Her tone was no longer snappy, hostile, or laced with so much attitude. I didn’t know if things were registering for her or what, but she hadn’t felt the need to give me any back talk whatsoever, not even a simple smacking of the teeth was heard from her. I hated she had to see or hear any of the bullshit Houston brought but it had to happen for her to open her eyes to reality.

My week had been completely different from Melanie’s. While she was in her bubble taking it all in, I was going through hell. I wasn’t able to keep anything down, not even water. I just knew I came down with some kind of bug or something. I felt so weak no matter how much I slept.

Finally able to make it out the bed, I headed for the bathroom for a quick wash up. I’d get my shower after breakfast. I was praying my body let me ingest something today. I was hungry as hell and really wanted to pig out. Taking Mel out to lunch and maybe shopping to ease the tension had been on my mind so I guess it was fitting. My appointment was at nine-thirty so it wouldn’t interfere with her interview.

I tackled my mouth and face before throwing on my robe and joining Mel downstairs. She had it smelling nice and just the smell of pancakes had me excited to eat. Food had been my comfort zone lately and I had absolutely no complaints.

“Thanks, baby. It looks good,” I stated sitting down at the island.

“You’re welcome.” She took a seat beside me and for the first time since we moved here, I felt like she wanted to be near me. “Mama, why didn’t you tell me what was really going on with Daddy?”

I knew she would question everything from that day. Houston did entirely too much and probably felt no remorse about it. That was the kind of nigga he was. Making others’ lives miserable was fun for him. I left Atlanta because I knew the kind of life we would’ve had if we stayed.

“I tried but everything that happened needed to because you needed to see your father for who he was. I tell you what you need to know, but I also shelter you from the shit that’ll cause you hurt. Houston has another family and that’s the reality, baby. His new woman doesn’t want you around because you look just like me. You would be nothing but a constant reminder that there was a woman before her.”

“But Daddy?—”

“Is a joke,” I said cutting her off. I couldn’t let her defend him. He showed his ass and left like nothing happened. He didn’t care about her or what she had going on.

“Was everything he said a lie?” she inquired as she played over her eggs.

“Listen, your father won’t say or do anything if it doesn’t benefit him. I called him about your graduation as a courtesy to you because I knew how much that would mean to you. He blocked you from all his socials and changed his number before the divorce was even final. That should tell you something. I don’tharasshim because I got this. I didn’t need him then and I damn sure don’t need him now. Everything you have is because of me.Imake shit move for you and on occasions, Onyx. Understand who’s in your corner.”

She sat quietly, finally eating. I knew she was deep in thought because it was a lot to think about. All the times she defendedher father was probably haunting her ass.Good!She needed this reality check. Nothing in life goes the way we plan it and this was one hell of a hurdle she needed to overcome.

“I been thinking, and I just want to say sorry.”

“For?”

“Everything… mostly hating you. I didn’t know how much Daddy didn’t care. I thought you was just doing it to be an asshole.”

“Tuh.Yeah, sure,” I said filling my mouth with another fork full of pancakes.

“I’m serious, Mama. I don’t remember Daddy being so mean. He was always sweet and taking me places. Whatever I asked for, he’d get it. I just thought you were jealous of our bond and wanted to ruin it,” she confessed.

“I got you whatever you asked for because he would tell me all about your request. My money footed that marriage, not his. I’ve always held my own.” I had to correct these memories of hers. It was me and always had been.

“I don’t remember him putting his hands on you, either. I’m sorry for letting him do that. I miss my friends from Atlanta, but I’m willing to make it work here for you. I’ll try and stay out of trouble.”

“I don’t need you to do a damn thing for me, Melanie, but start showing some respect. I can handle everything else.” She nodded and we finished breakfast in silence.

She wasn’t nothing but a teenager stepping into adult shit. The things me and Houston went through wasn’t for her. However, they both involved one another. He lied to her any chance he could, and she believed it. My ex-husband was a clown and me and my daughter wasn’t going to be a part of his circus. I was too much of a boss to allow it.

Once I was done, I went upstairs and started the shower. I had an hour to get myself together before it was time to head out.I went to my closet and rummaged through the pieces hanging. The weather had been nice lately, so I settled on a simple sleeveless shirt and skirt to match. I didn’t feel the need to get too dressed up since I was coming directly home after. My little mini vacation from the shop was coming to an end.

I undressed and hopped in the shower allowing the hot water to coat my body. It was so refreshing that I made a mental note to schedule a spa day. I deserved it.

I stood there washing and thinking about Chrome for the umpteenth time. I just couldn’t get the look of disappointment he wore out of my head. As a mother, I didn’t want Melanie to see any of that shit that went down. If she wasn’t there, I would’ve let Chrome do his thing. However, my child came first. She wouldn’t be here today if I let that man end Houston that day.

Did I miss him? Of course I did. He held me like no other man could and when he kissed me, I felt all the love he had for me. I missed the smell of his cologne and how it slightly shifted something in me with each inhale. I missed the way he smiled at me when I caught him staring. I just couldn’t shake that nigga.

Did he miss me? That was something I wanted to know desperately. I fucked up and could admit that, even to him. I was in a place where any decision I made would hinder me. Life decided to drop a case of lemons on me and challenged me to turn it to lemonade the way I’d been doing. The task was impossible and now here I was wondering if I was still the woman he loved.

With my thoughts scattered, the need to call Earl presented itself. I held it as long as I could while I rinsed off. I slid the door back and leaned over the toilet letting all the contents from breakfast fill it. I held onto the back of the toilet for balance. It was getting to a point where I just wanted them to put a tube in my stomach or something. I couldn’t take this any longer.

“Mama, are you okay? You’ve been throwing up all week.”