Page 38 of Chrome

Undressing, I wrapped the sheet around me and took a seat on the table. She’d set it up to where I could lay back comfortably while she performed the ultrasound.

“Lay back and place your feet in the slots. This will give us an almost accurate estimate on how far along you are. The fetus will show here on the screen.”

I followed her instruction and allowed her to do her thing. The wand she used was inserted and like she stated, the baby appeared on the screen as she pressed against my cervix. Tears fell silently as I eyed the screen. Lately, my hormones had been out of whack, and I found myself emotional more than usual. This damn baby was the cause of it.

“Mama… what in the hell?” Melanie asked as she rushed to the monitor. She was saying exactly what I wanted to. “You’re pregnant for real.”

“You’re seven weeks to be exact. Congratulations, Ms. Jordan. Right now, there are no concerns other than the weight. The Zofran will allow you to eat and pick that back up in no time,” Dr. Ballet spoke joyously while I was still trying to process what the hell was going on.

“What you gon’ do, Mama? Are you really gonna have another baby?”

“It looks like I am,” I said busting out in a full cry.

I couldn’t believe that nigga trapped me. Not once did he know what the fuck it meant to pull out and not once did I stop him. I just loved the feeling of him and look what that good of a feeling got me. Thirty-seven with a seven-week-old fetus. What a fuckin’ joke.

“If you want to explore other options, Ms. Jordan, you can. I see how overwhelming this is, so I’ll give them to you if you’d like,” Dr. Ballet suggested.

“Please,” I answered before she could finish her sentence good.

“Not a problem. We have a pharmacy here so if you’d give us thirty minutes to get it filled, you could be on your way right after. For now, you can get dressed and one of the nurses will bring you a Zofran tablet so when you do leave, you can grab something to eat and actually enjoy it.”

“Thank you, Dr. Ballet.”

“Of course. When you check out, they’ll have a packet for you with other options regarding the pregnancy.” She stood and took her leave.

Mel grabbed my hands and helped me sit up. She occupied the seat she did earlier while I went and changed. Nothing about Eastlake was giving me a break. In the few months that I’d been here, I’d dealt with more bullshit than in the thirty-seven years I lived in Atlanta. My God all I wanted was a simple, and peaceful life. I didn’t understand why all this wanted to happen to me when I was damn near forty years old.

I walked out and the nurse was back with the pill Dr. Ballet prescribed. I took it and grabbed my things. I decided to wait in the lobby for the full prescription. When we returned, the chick that was running off at the mouth was gone. I was thankful for it because I did not feel like going back and forth with her again.

While we waited, I texted Onyx and told her to come to the house. She stated she would tonight before she linked with Zinc.Those two came out of left field but I was happy she was having fun with him. She was very outgoing, and he seemed to be the same. If he was around Chrome, I had no doubt in my mind he behaved just like him.

Twenty minutes flew by, and we were finally leaving with my packets and pills. I wasn’t doing shit but eating and sleeping when I got home. Melanie’s interview couldn’t happen on a worser day. Both of my kids were running me ragged, and one had no clue about it.

&

“Bestie. Bestie!” I was awakened by Onyx’s voice and her shaking me back and forth. I finally had the feeling of fullness which gave me the itis and I was out like a light after. Her waking me up was rubbing me wrong already.

“I’m up, I’m up,” I said throwing the covers back.

“Cool. Can I borrow your YSL heels? The nude ones.” She was already searching for them before I could give her an answer.

“Why do you need my heels Onyx? Where you going?” I sat up in bed and watched her damn near tear my closet apart.

“Chrome’s birthday party. Speaking of, why ain’t you dressed? His party started like an hour ago.”

Birthday? He’s that mad at me that he didn’t invite me to his birthday party?

Tears formed and I wiped them away swiftly before they could fall. My feelings were hurt, I couldn’t’ lie. I didn’t think he would shut me out on a day like this. I owed him an explanation as well as an apology. I was guessing he wasn’t budging until he got it which meant I was losing out on moments of his like this.

“I didn’t know,” I mumbled.

“Didn’t know what? Found them!” She stepped out the closet with the shoes in tow. She dropped them to the floor and slipped her feet inside. She then ran to my mirror and gave herself a onceover. “Mhmm.”

“I didn’t know about his birthday or his party. I haven’t spoken to him since that day at the shop.”

“What? You ain’t called him to smooth shit over yet? What the hell you waiting on?” She was confused and it showed. Her brows were dipped, nose was scrunched, and lips were turned up.

Onyx was slightly different from me. Whenever she fucked up, she owned it. Accountability was easy for her. She grew up with her father teaching her how honest people behaved. I, on the other hand, had a hard time getting over the embarrassing prideful window. I didn’t have a problem apologizing, I had a problem with the timing of it. It had been a week, and I was scared to even say a word to Chrome even though I knew I needed to.

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