Page 12 of Home Run

I didn’t watch as she dipped the ends of each test in the pee. I wanted to hide behind my hands and peek through my fingers. The buzzing in my ears moved over my skin, interfering with my heartbeat until I was convinced I was about to have a heart attack.

The tests didn’t even need the full two minutes. All three came back the same.

PREGNANT 5–6 WEEKS SINCE CONCEPTION.

I stared down in disbelief. Except I had to believe it. It was there in black and white on a tiny plastic stick, and if I still didn’t want to believe it my body decided that was the time to be sick again. I hurled in the trash can.

“Oh no. No. No.”

Doctor Scott passed me a wet paper towel to wipe my mouth. “I take it this wasn’t planned.”

“No.” My eyes shot to hers, with a healthy amount of pleading for her to tell me this was all a big joke.Ha ha. Got you.Except she didn’t. Instead, she gently guided me back to the chair.

“I’ll take a blood test while you’re here, for double confirmation, but we can also talk about your options.”

“Options?”

“Termination.”

Another wave of nausea hit me. I’d woken up this morning excited for the day, you know, beyond all the being sick. That’s why I’d booked an early appointment to come here, so I could get it over with, get some antinausea meds and go meet Radley at the gym. Then we were going for lunch to this cute Mexican place we’d found. Making decisions about abortion was not on my agenda.

“You don’t need to decide today,” Doctor Scott assured me. “Is the father someone in your life?”

“Not through choice,” I mumbled, or maybe I never said it at all, because the second realization hit. I had to tell Tanner.

I hadn’t spoken to him since the day I’d kicked him out of my dorm room. The day I’d behaved so badly, when he’d been nothing but kind. Tanner, who’d messaged me good morning and good night every day for months, had gonesilent. I hadn’t heard from him since he’d slammed the door, and it was all my fault.

And now I had to tell him I was pregnant.

“Is this a conversation you can have with the father?”

I shrugged and looked out of the window. The guy was still going full throttle on his bike.

“What about your mom, or your friends?”

I focused back on the doctor, realizing I’d not heard a word she’d said. “Sorry, can you repeat that?”

“Millie, do you have a friend to talk to? Maybe I can call someone to come and get you.”

That snapped me out of the daze I was in. No, I didn’t need the doctor calling anyone.

“I’m fine, I’ll figure it out. I’m supposed to meet my best friend now.”

Doctor Scott nodded. “Okay, good. Let me draw some blood, then we’ll get you an appointment for next week to talk about where to go from here.”

“Thank you,” I said, holding out my arm as she wound the pressure cuff over it.

“Whatever you decide, it’ll be okay. Don’t worry,” she replied, sliding a needle into my vein.

I watched the syringe fill with thick, dark red blood and never wanted to believe someone so badly.

Radley’s blonde ponytail swung behind her as she jogged toward me.

“Mills, where’ve you been? I was calling you.”

I stared down at the phone in my hand. Sure enough,there were a dozen missed calls from Radley, but I swear I’d not noticed a single one. I was thirty minutes late too.

“I just came from the doctor.”

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