Page 62 of Electricity

A series of emojis followed, angels, and devils, and one smiley face licking its lips.

Do you expect me to say you’re welcome, asshole?

Lacey had responded, and gotten nothing back.

I handed her back her phone. “You think it’s over?”

“I fucking hope so. I just can’t believe he told everyone.”

“Not about the rape.”

“That’s even worse! Making it sound like I wanted him?” She did a full body shudder. “Do you know how many guys are gonna assume that just because I put out for Danny, I’ll put out for them? And then, if I don’t put out for them, they’ll think it’s because Danny’s dick set the bar for all other dicks in my life, and their dicks can’t compare or some stupid shit? It’s a win-win for him, and a lose-lose for me.”

“I’m so sorry, Lacey.”

“It just fucking sucks. All over again. It’d have been bad enough to not have anyone believe me—but now? I’m still a whore.”

I prayed to God that no one had written that on her locker this afternoon. “You know you’re not, right?”

“Of course I know. But everyone’s going to be thinking it.”

“Not me.”

She thumped against me, and put her head on my shoulder with a sigh. “Thanks.” Then she made an exhausted sound, leaned back the other way to right herself. “I’d better get back home. I can’t leave my mom alone for too long.”

“What is she, a puppy?”

“Close to it. She’s just not handling things well. You know how she’s dramatic, right?”

“Yeah.” Ms. Harper desperately needed to spend some time out in the real world.

“Well this hasn’t helped.” She stood and I followed her lead, we walked to the corner of my yard furthest away from Razor.

“You coming to school tomorrow?”

“Don’t know. Prolly won’t till tomorrow.”

“Not to sound callus, but if you do come to school, please dear God come rescue me from the bus.”

“If I do, will do,” she said, and waved low as she walked off.

Dinner that evening was a difficult affair. I could trust myself to cook now, but now that I’d opened the door to Allie’s participation I couldn’t close it again. So I herded her through the motions and we triumphantly had hamburger meat and boxes of noodles that were only a little bit chewy.

“I was thinking,” my mother announced, halfway through her first serving.

“Yeah?”

“You really do need to get out more, Jessie. High school’s the best time of your life, you know that, right?”

I stared blankly at her. A) While certain of my classmates were awesome, high school was objectively terrible and B) I always wanted the best part of my life to be ahead of me. Always. Looking behind you all the time was what got you trapped places like this, here.

“I just want you to be like me, to have good memories to look back at. I know you’re smart—but that’s not the only important thing in life, you know? You need to be more social while you can.”

“Uh huh,” I said, non-committal.

“You can try to do that some, can’t you? For my sake?”

I nodded slowly.

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