Page 35 of Long Hard Fall

So, he’d missed his chance. But he wanted to hear his name screamed from her lips and Sissy was staying under the same roof. Awkward.

Abbi wasn’t going to be another quick fuck. Last time hadn’t turned out quick, either, thanks to him conking out like a baby until morning.

“Are you going back to bed or getting your hands dirty with me?” He held his breath, waiting for her answer. Spending this much time with a woman who wasn’t kin just didn’t happen, but he wanted it to.

She peered out the kitchen window and looked down at her clothes. “I’ll run and change.”

The corner of his mouth kicked up in a smile, and he made sure not to miss her sexy sashay out of the room.

He stayed in place and stared down into his glass.

He liked her. Despite her reason for hanging around him, the part of her brother she hadn’t known, she’d been the calm in the storm that was his family life the last few days.

There’d been no abuse, so Cash had always justified his parents’ relationship and how they treated him as normal. He was lucky—he had a home, he was his own boss, and his family loved him. And Mom did love him, even though they didn’t share blood. There’d been no cruelty. His father had never raised a hand to Mom or Sissy. Neither had Mom physically punished Cash or Sissy. Groundings had been fairly frequent and Mom could give a tongue-lashing that’d leave a man limping but nothing close to corporal punishment.

So, he’d told himself he had it good. Damn good. But he just wasn’t cut out for a relationship—he was his father’s son, after all.

He frowned as he remembered the time in high school when he’d started dating Bobbi Jo Wilkins. They’d been sixteen and she’d been the cheerleader for his football team. Things had been going well, drama free, and Bobbi Jo had gone through the meet-the-parents gig. He and Bobbi Jo hadn’t even had sex, both still virgins despite some hot and heavy make-out sessions.

Then he’d been waiting for a ride after school. Mom was going to pick him up because she’d had to use the truck that day. Waiting outside, he’d been laughing and joking around with Jennie, another classmate. Didn’t think it’d even elevated to the level of harmless flirting.

But Mom had seen and been pissed. He’d gotten lectured all the way home about how he didn’t deserve a nice girl like Bobbi Jo if he couldn’t refrain from hitting on another girl at only sixteen. Mom had asked him to imagine how Bobbi Jo would’ve felt driving up on a scene like that and then having to walk around school the next day while everyone gave her pitying looks.

Cash had been humbled and guilt ridden. He’d broken up with Bobbi Jo the next day, thinking he was doing her a favor. She was married now, with three kids, and still one of the sweetest people he knew. But he’d changed that day.

God, why hadn’t he seen it? He didn’t get a case of what-could-have-beens when he thought of his first and last official girlfriend, but that day had changed the whole trajectory of his life.

His time with Abbi made him ask what would’ve happened if he’d stayed in a relationship at sixteen. Cheating wasn’t inevitable. Sure, he’d been a teenager at the mercy of his hormones, had found other girls attractive, but he hadn’t once considered so much as kissing anyone other than Bobbi Jo.

As far as he knew, his uncles had never cheated. Cash had grown up with them as father figures as much as his own.

It was a lot to think about.

“Ready?” Abbi bounded back in. Her hair remained in a messy ponytail, but she wore her clothes from the previous day, only freshly laundered.

“I’ll get my boots.”

He led her to the side of the barn where the tractor sat with the feeder attachment already hooked and filled. Slowing, he eyed the setup.

“I didn’t mention,” he glanced at her, “that it’s not a two-seater.”

“So… I run behind you or what?”

It was hard to get her worked up. He liked that about her. “I can show you how to drive, or you can stand and hang on.”

He expected a dubious, Are you kidding? Riding shotgun was something he and his cousins had always done. The safety police would’ve had a heart attack if they’d seen how the kids would plant their feet on one of the steps and hold on as huge wheels turned in front and behind them.

She clapped her hands and jumped up and down. “I’ll hang on and watch you drive first. Then I’ll take over. I don’t want to run over any cows.”

He hopped in and fired it up, then showed Abbi where to grip. Fighting the smile on his face proved impossible as she oohed and aahed over everything.

“This is so beautiful.” She whipped her head around, her cheeks pink from the chilly breeze, tendrils of hair licking her face. “I bet it’s gorgeous in the summer, all green and full of wildflowers. Ohmigosh, is that a hawk? It’s huge!” She released a gusty sigh. “I miss this. I didn’t get to help Grandpa much because I was too young, but I can remember playing in the fields.”

She chatted and asked questions about what they were doing. Cash flat-out laughed at her excitement over filling the troughs with feed.

“Look at that!” She practically danced on her perch. “It just shoots out from that wagon-thingy and—boom! Cows are fed.”

He normally enjoyed his morning chores. They’d become a comforting routine, a way to reconnect with the basics of life. He had a job, healthy cows, fertile bulls, and was surrounded by family. But Abbi’s presence and exuberance showed that maybe, just maybe, he’d been a little lonely.

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