Page 9 of Kill Your Darlings

“Yes, how did you find this place?”

“It’s famous, and it’s named after one of Eliot’s cat poems.”

“And they have alcoholic milkshakes,” Wendy said, reading the menu.

“Let’s go walk around the campus,” Thom said, “then find a place for dinner.”

It wasn’t until it was dark and they were slowly meandering their way back to their Airbnb from the Vietnamese restaurant they’d eaten at that Thom mentioned the significance of where they were.

“Is this really the first time we’ve been back here since...?”

“I think so,” Wendy said.

“How old were we?”

“It was eighth grade, so I think we were probably both fourteen.”

“God, time is strange.” Thom was speaking too loud, a sure sign that he’d had too much drink. At one point during the meal she’d gone to the restroom, noticing that his gin and tonic was half-empty. When she’d returned, it was three-quarters full. Either she was losing her mind or he had quickly sucked down his drink, flagged a waiter to bring him a new one, then had two big swallows of the new drink. All in the time it had taken her to pee, and then reapply her lipstick.

“Meaning what?”

“I don’t know. Meaning we were here in this same place, younger versions of ourselves, without any idea of all the things that were going to happen. And it was a different time back then, wasn’t it? Imean, we were fourteen and on our own at night, running around. Goddamn freedom.”

“We weren’t on our own,” Wendy said.

“Not on the trip, we weren’t, but the night you took me to the steps.”

“I don’t think so,” Wendy said. “That’s not how I remember it. We told MissAckles that we wanted to look at the Exorcist Steps, andshebrought us down there.”

“No, I don’t think so,” Thom said.

“She hung back, a little. I mean, I don’t think she was standing right next to us when we kissed. But she was nearby. I’m sure of it.”

“It’s coming back to me. A little. She tried to scare us, tell us how we were being watched.”

“That part I don’t remember.”

“Maybe it was just me.”

“It doesn’t matter anyway. We both know we were there. At the top of the steps.”

“You mean the bottom.”

“Now you’re just being contrary on purpose,” Wendy said.

“I am. But we did go to the bottom of the steps. We started up top, and you and I ran all the way down and then back up. I remember being out of breath.”

“I don’t remember that part at all. Maybe you ran down the steps and I stayed at the top.”

“Sensible even at fourteen.”

“I was.”

“Oh, here they are.”

They both stopped at the top of the narrow stairs that ran down between a painted brick building and a stone wall. Streetlights illuminated the steep steps so that it almost looked like a tunnel carved out of the dark night. Wendy had read or heard somewhere that these days the steps were mostly used as a makeshift gym, runnerssprinting up and down them for some inexplicable reason. But it was late, and the night had turned cold, and no one was around except for the two of them. Thom stepped forward, standing on the top step, his hand on the metal handrail.

“Where exactly were we standing when we kissed? This isn’t quite how I pictured it,” Thom said.

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