Page 8 of My Last Dance

“It’ll be better, I’m sure of it, Piper. I’m tired, you’re not. You deserve to keep going with someone who has the drive to win. It’s just not in me anymore.”

“Did you tell Luka and Michelle?”

“Yeah, they know.” He rubbed his jaw—his nervous tell—and I instantly knew he was hiding something from me.

“What? What did they say?”

He sighed and finally met my eyes. “They think it’s best if we hang it up, after…ya know…everything. They’ll probably call you tomorrow…” he trailed off.

They were dumping me too?I sat back on the chair. “What? No.” I shook my head. Everything was slipping away from me, all at once. It couldn’t end like this. It just couldn’t. I wouldn’t let it.

“You only stayed with Luka and Michelle because I liked them. You wanted to switch coaches anyway.”

“But…but…who’s gonna take me now?” I squeaked out. “Who’s gonna…” It really dawned on me then. I was labeled a bad sport, a bad bet, and at 5’7, I was too tall for most guy ice dancers. Finding a partner and a new coach in time would be…impossible. “Oh my God, Patrick, you need to stay with me.” My eyes widened. “You can’t abandon me like this.”

He scrubbed a hand down his face. “Piper, I’m not abandoning you. I tried my best to keep going, I just…can’t. I thought it was being away from home, so we came here, but now I’m realizing, it’s not that. I’m thirty-two-years-old, I can’t keep barfing from nerves. I’m ready to coach now. I need to start the next part of my life. I’m happy with our career. I mean, we’re Olympians, how many people can say that?”

“But we’re not Olympicgoldmedalists!” I laid my forehead down on the table with a smack. “I can’t believe this.”

“We still got to the Olympics, Piper. That’s a huge feat. You should be proud of that. Maybe we could coach together,” he said in a hopeful tone. “We’re a great team. And Piper, your legs, you shouldn’t be—”

“No.” I picked up my head to glare at him. “I amnotquitting.”

His shoulders fell. “Okay, I’m sorry.” He blew out a sigh. “It’ll be okay, Piper, it will. I’ll spread the word that you’re looking for a partner. I’m sure there will be some shake ups after the summer.”

“After the summer?” I shrieked. His eyes darted around us. He was clearly uncomfortable that I was causing a scene in this fancy ass restaurant, but I couldn’t hold in my emotions. “Patrick, I need someonenow!This fall is the start of the Olympic cycle!”

His throat bobbed with a swallow. “I know.”

I slammed my hand on the table, almost knocking over our wine glasses. “And you’restillquitting?”

“Piper…” His eyes rounded with apology.

“There’s nothing I can say to change your mind?” I asked, desperation seeping into my voice.

He slowly shook his head. “No. I’m really sorry. I don’t want this to wreck our relationship. We had a great run, and we accomplished so much together. You’re one of my best friends, Piper. I care about you, I really do, but when I think of going to the Olympics again, I don’t feel excited, I just feel nauseous.” The words caught in his throat, and he choked up for a second. “I’m really sorry.”

My heart pretty much shriveled up. “Okay.” I reached across the table to squeeze his hand. “I care about you too, Patrick.”

He stood and pulled me into a hug. People were staring at us, but I didn’t care, I needed that hug.

“I’ll do anything I can to help you, all right?” he whispered. “You know I will.”

Just not skate, I mentally quipped. But I swallowed down the pain and nodded against him.

“Do you need a ride to the airport in the morning?”

“No, I’ll just order an uber,” I told him with a weak smile. I didn’t trust myself to be in the car with him for a whole half hour. I’d end up screaming at him in desperation, which really would wreck our relationship.

We spent the rest of the night avoiding talk of skating. We chatted about his family, my family, our friends in Chicago, literally anything and everything except for figure skating. But in the back of my mind, that’s all I could think about.

After finishing dinner, he gave me another hug.

It wouldn’t be the same. I’d spent years holding his hand, leaning on him, him leaning on me, working together toward the same dreams. I could practically read his mind. His body sometimes felt like an extension of my own on the ice. We were partners. And now we weren’t. Just like that.

I’d never felt quite so alone in myentire life.

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