Page 42 of Cowboy's Christmas Wife

Daryl considered decking his brother. “When I realized how much I’d putyourfuture at risk by pushing you too hard, loading too much up onto you.”

Kyle’s laughter disappeared. “Wait, this…this isn’t because of the barn accident, is it?” Daryl just shrugged in reply, and Kyle shook his head. “Dude, it was anaccident.The same thing could have happened even if you were standing right there.”

“But Iwasn’tstanding there,” Daryl argued. “You were here on your own, bleeding yourself dry, until you called Georgina. That’s on me.”

“And if I’d shown any good sense at all, I’d have waited another day to deal with the ranch rather than throwing a fit and tackling it by myself just because I was mad at you,” Kyle countered. “That’s on me. I did something stupid, and I paid the price for it. End of story.”

His younger brother stared at him for a good, long minute, clearly waiting for him to say something, but Daryl couldn’t think of a thing to say. He didn’t agree with his brother, and that was that. The guilt wasn’t going to go away just because Kyle said so.

“I think you’re punishing yourself,” Kyle said after they’d completed two more posts in near silence.

“I’m what?”

“You’re not going after Laura, not trying to win her back, because you’re punishing yourself for being with her when I got hurt.” The words were quiet, and Kyle wouldn’t look at him. “Do you need to hear that I forgive you? I mean, I don’t actually blame you in the first place, but if forgiveness is what it’ll take for you to get off your ass, then you have it, okay? I forgive you. I want you to be happy. And we both known damn well that happiness for you means being with Laura. So go get her.”

* * *

Laura sat at Jeanette’s desk and stared at yet another set of divorce papers. Although she and Daryl had initially decided to get an annulment, Jeanette suggested that a divorce would be what everyone would expect. It was much more common, and much more realistic. Even though she knew this was coming, it didn’t make the pain go away in the slightest to stare at the neat stack of papers. “What are your reasons for filing?” Jeanette asked. State law dictated that she had to have a reason for the split, so they would need to put something down.

She sighed. “Irreconcilable differences,” she said. It was a catch-all term that could mean everything and nothing at the same time, but it boiled down to the idea that there were fundamental differences between them that they couldn’t overcome. For a marriage that lasted less than four months, that was the answer that made the most sense.

Jeanette nodded her head, but even as she filled in the right part of the divorce decree, she looked up at Laura with the saddest look on her face. “Jeanette,” Laura all but growled. “Stop.”

“Stop what?” her friend asked. “I’m not doing anything.” Laura knew that there was a but coming, and she wasn’t the least surprised bit surprised when Jeanette continued. “But are you sure that this is what you want?”

She wanted to sayof course, this is what I wantand be confident in that decision. But, truth was, she wasn’t sure at all what she wanted anymore. Or rather, she felt like she wanted too many things, and she had to pick between them. She wanted to be independent. She wanted to be a good role model to Lily. But at the same time, she wanted Daryl in her life, and in Lily’s life, too. “I want—” Laura shook her head. “I don’t know what I want.” It was all so much clearer when she divorced Clark. She hadn’t had any hesitations over signing those papers.

“I’ve never had a client look so close to throwing up over a divorce that they were asking for,” Jeanette pointed out.

“So what?” Laura snapped back. She was tired of having this conversation. “Let’s just get this over with, okay? Can we do that?”

Jeanette nodded and handed her one of the heavy, gold-plated pens from the locked drawer on her desk. Laura reached for it with trembling fingers; she nearly dropped it when the full weight of the pen dropped into her hand. “I’ve marked all the places you need to sign and initial,” Jeanette said and watched when she took that pen to the document. Laura’s hands trembled so badly that she couldn’t actually make the letters to form her name. She kept trying to steady herself—even to go as far as to put down the fancy pen and ask for one of the simple, throwaway promotional pens that Jeanette used as advertisement—but still her hands trembled. “I can put it on a tablet for you to e-sign it?” Jeanette suggested.

Laura let out a laugh, but it came out more like a sob. She ducked her head and rested it on her arms. “I don’t know if I can do this,” she mumbled.

“What was that?” Jeanette sounded nearly gleeful.Damn her, Laura thought unkindly.

She sat up, glaring. “I don’t think that I can sign these.”

“Because why?” Jeanette pressed.

There were so many reasons, Laura didn’t even know where to start. She had everything that she was supposed to want, everything that was supposed to make her happy. She was back in the town that she loved, she was free from Clark in every aspect of her life, she was living in the house that held so many happy memories for her, and she was fully independent. And yet…the independence felt hollow when she was so lonely. And at the end of the day, the house that she had put so much of her time, her heart, and her money into was just a heap of bricks and boards. It was going to look beautiful after all of the renovations, but ultimately, it was empty with just her and Lily to live there. It didn’t feel like a full home because they didn’t feel like a full family.

On the other hand, she’d never felt more at home anywhere than when she was at the ranch. It wasn’t just Daryl’s siblings and nieces and nephew that attracted her. Laura would have wanted Daryl even without his charming, if somewhat, crazy family. She loved him, and she loved being married to him. “I want to be his wife,” she said. “I want to stay his wife.”

Jeanette smiled. “That’s more like it!” she crooned and slapped her hands together. “Let’s see about that now.”

“Jeanette—” Her lawyer looked at her. “What if he doesn’t want me to be his wife?”

She laughed. “Trust me, he wants you to be his wife. Everyone but you, apparently, can see it.” She reached over and took Laura’s hand. “You deserve all of the happiness in the world, Laura. You deserve to trust your heart.”

TWENTY-SIX

Being up to his elbows in refuse wasn’t exactly how Daryl pictured this day going, but before he could do anything in the way of winning back Laura, he had to make something right first. “Dude, that’s nasty!” Kyle called from his post as lookout outside of the dumpster. “You better have time to shower before she gets here because if you don’t, you’re going to smell like hot garbage juice while you spill your guts.”

“I’m aware of that,” Daryl griped back. “Shut up and keep watch!”

Kyle scoffed. “Relax! Georgina texted and said she was going to run interference for us. She spotted her and that lawyer friend of hers at the café in town. If they leave, she’ll let us know.”

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