Page 13 of Undone

The nickname again.

He met my eyes with a look that made me melt a little. It told me that even though he was asking me to go beyond my comfort zone, he’d be there for me. That he cared for me, whether that care was brotherly or something more.

Maybe if we spent time together alone, I’d be able to make sense of whatever was happening between us. Because even though Josh’s mouth was saying one thing, his eyes were telling a completely different story.

TEN

ZOE

Ithought I was going to hyperventilate.

Josh’s horse was a giant, muscular thing that kept snorting and stomping its hooves while Josh finished saddling him up. The hulking creature was a few feet away and looking like it was ready to take off for the hills. Josh didn’t seem at all bothered by the way it was acting, but I didn’t trust it.

“Hey, you okay?” Josh asked when he finally looked up at me.

I nodded, unable to squeak out a word. Sweat was dripping down my back and it wasn’t that hot out yet.

“Indigo’s quite a specimen, huh?” Josh patted the side of the beast’s neck.

“Yeah, um, he looks…strong. And fast.” And like he could rear up and stomp me flat into the ground.

Josh laughed good naturedly. “Yup, he’s both of those things. But your horse? Well, let’s just say Sugar never gets out of second gear. She’s a sweet old granny. I’m going to grab her. Back in a sec.”

I paced in a circle, trying to pep-talk my way into confidence. Based on what Josh had said, all I’d have to do was sit on the horse and it would do all the work, slowly and carefully. I could handle that, right? I’d borrowed a pair of Shannon’s cowboy boots, and I hated to admit how much I liked them, considering that they were nothing like what I’d usually wear. They were comfortable and had a worn-in, well-loved appeal that made me look like I might know what I was doing. I figured fake it till you make it would help get my head in the game. And by game, I meant keeping my ass in a saddle without completely losing my mind in fear.

Josh rounded the corner leading a pale yellow horse with a white-blonde mane and tail. Even my Grinchy little heart could see that the thing was gorgeous. I was also relieved to note that it had none of the frenetic energy that Josh’s horse did.

“She’s saddled up so I think we’re good to go,” Josh said with a huge smile. “I’m really excited to do this with you. We’re going to have fun!”

The fear I’d been feeling mysteriously disappeared when I saw his smiling face. Josh was going to make everything okay the way he always did.

“Let’s do this,” he said in an encouraging voice. “Remember, Zo, I’ll be right behind you.”

“Wait,” I squeaked out. “I have to gofirst?”

He laughed. “Well, yeah. I want to watch you and study how you handle the trail.”

I felt my cheeks go pink at the thought of Josh staring at my ass for the whole ride. Did it look cute in the jeans I’d worn? Did I have bedhead in the back of my head?

“So, I know it’s been a while, but I want to make sure you remember the basics of the reins and signaling.” He walked me through how to get Sugar to turn left and right using the reins, and then added in cues for the horse while using my legs. “Just light squeezes. She’s a smart lady and won’t need much encouragement.” I did my best to keep my face expressionless while he took me through the motions. I didn’t want him to know just how freaked out I was, even though Sugar looked like she was moving in slow motion.

“Up we go, Zo. C’mon, I’ll help.”

I felt a little thrill when Josh held my arm as I swung my boot up to the stirrup, but then realized that I wasdoing this. I swung my leg over Sugar’s back and tried to keep my trembling to a minimum, but I couldn’t stop the squeak.

“Looking good up there. Like a pro,” Josh said as he walked back to Indigo and hopped up into the saddle in a single graceful motion. “Let’s get moving. Tap your heels into her sides like I showed you.”

I thought back to what Shannon always said about how horses were almost psychic and could sense what their riders were feeling. Once upon a time, I had been okay with horses, and had reallylikedthem, so I reached deep inside to channel that old version of me. Given that I’d stupidly agreed to the ride with Josh, it wasn’t like I had much of a choice.

I took a deep breath and did as instructed, tapping my heels to urge Sugar toward the path that cut into the brush. “Like this?” I hated that my voice cracked.

“Yup, perfect. But loosen your arms a little. You might be accidentally telling her things you don’t mean.”

After a few tense minutes, I settled into Sugar’s rhythm and finally let my body relax. Josh wasn’t lying when he said the mare was mellow. It felt like I could walk faster than the horse.

“Okay, I’ll admit it, this is sort of fun,” I said over my shoulder. I felt like the sunshine was giving me a much-needed dose of vitamin D.

“Told you.”

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