Page 58 of Undone

Zoe’s Jeep wasn’t there.

Maybe she had errands to run in town. I headed back to the house, breaking into a jog and taking the steps two at a time. My sister was waiting for me in the kitchen.

“Shannon? Where is she?”

My sister’s lips trembled. “She’s gone.”

“Gone? Gone where? She wasn’t due to fly out until Wednesday.”

Without waiting for an answer, I ran up the steps and pushed the door to the yellow room open hard enough that it slammed into the wall. The bed had been stripped down to the mattress with the blankets folded neatly at the end. I went to the wardrobe and opened the doors to see empty hangers. Rushing over to the dresser, I opened each drawer, staring at… nothing.

All of her stuff was gone.

I backed up until my legs hit the bed, then I landed on the mattress as air rushed out of my lungs.

“She thought it would be better for the both of you if she left early. She was planning on going standby but if she couldn’t get an earlier flight out, she was going to stay at the airport hotel,” Shannon said from where she was standing in the doorway.

“Just like that?” She’d waited until she knew I was busy and snuck out, so she wouldn’t have to see me. Wouldn’t have to say goodbye. I felt like I was going to hyperventilate.

Zoe was gone.

“It wasn’t an easy decision for her. She was hurting, too, Josh.”

I closed my eyes and took a long, deep breath and let it out slowly. “It’s all right. I understand. She couldn’t stand to be around me anymore, so she left. Without giving me the chance to say anything.” To say goodbye.

She ran.

“That’s not true,” Shannon said, but by the tone of her voice, I don’t think she believed that any more than I did.

I stood up, left the room, and walked down the stairs on autopilot. When I got to the backdoor, I kept going and ended up in the side yard where we used to keep the chickens and where our mom had the kitchen garden. I paced back and forth on the hard earth, the gravel crunching under my boots where the garden had gone fallow. After my parents died, there were a lot of things we’d stopped doing. I couldn’t remember the last time I’d picked a fruit or a vegetable off the vine.

I ended up in front of the old chicken coop. The wood was cracked and rotted and there were large gaps along the seams. Without thinking about it, I lifted my leg and kicked the side of the coop with the bottom of my boot. It made a satisfactory cracking sound and the coop rocked back and forth.

So I kicked it again, and again, eventually knocking a chunk of wood loose. Grabbing the widening gap, I pulled as hard as I could and ripped the entire side off. Dry rot was obvious and for once I was grateful for the damage—it made it easier to tear the whole thing apart. Within minutes, I had taken out my anger and loss on the old boards as I demolished the coop that my dad had built for my mom.

I stared at the pile of trash, my palms throbbing with splinters and my breathing ragged.

“Feel better?” my sister asked quietly from behind me.

I shook my head. “No.”

“Zoe didn’t either when she left, which was why she didn’t wait to say goodbye.”

“She should have waited.”

My sister got closer and hugged me from behind. “I’m sorry, Josh, I really am.”

“I know.” But it didn’t help.

Before either of us could say more, an alarm went off on my phone. The motion detectors had picked something up. I opened the app and looked at the pics from the cameras out there. There, just off to the right, was a large fluffy tail.

“What is it?” Shannon asked but I didn’t answer. I jogged to the house and didn’t stop until I reached my office. My key was in my hand, the gun cabinet was opened, and I was already making my way back outbefore my sister caught up to me. “Josh? What are you doing? It’s getting dark out. It isn’t safe. Give me a minute to grab my gun and I’ll join you. Josh?”

“No, I’ve got this. Stay here where it’s safe.” And I strode out into the twilight determined to divest myself of at least one bad thing in my life.

The next morning, I woke with a groan and looked to see the sun shining bright outside my windows. I had no idea how late it was by the time I’d gotten back to the house last night and I’d been surprised to see Shannon sitting in one of the rockers on the porch, a rifle laying across her lap. Waiting for me. I was glad she hadn’t tried to follow me. I don’t know what I’d been thinking attempting to hunt wolves in the dark with no backup. I could have been seriously injured or worse.

Rather than apologize to my sister and thank her for staying up, I’d grabbed a half-full bottle of whiskey and proceeded to drink myself into a stupor. And that was the last thing I remembered—until waking up just now. I looked around me. Come to think of it, how the hell did I get to my bedroom when I was sure I’d passed out downstairs?

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