Page 9 of Undone

I hip-checked her bedroom door open and half expected the room to be strewn with clothing, but then I remembered that this was Zoe. Everything was hotel room tidy. She had unpacked, putting everything away, and her luggage was tucked in a corner near the wardrobe.

I placed her on the bed and the moment I pulled my arms away from her body, she frowned, a little furrow creasing her forehead. I paused, still leaning over her, hoping that she wouldn’t wake up. Her skin looked like sweet cream in the moonlight. She was beautiful, and her face was angelic in its innocence.

“Good night, Zo,” I whispered, then padded silently out of her room.

SIX

ZOE

Josh carrying me to bed last nightwasn’ta dream.

I glanced down at my body and cringed when I saw how my thin tank top practically put a spotlight on my nipples. And my boy shorts left a quarter of my ass hanging out! What was I thinking, parading around the Cafferty house dressed like that? The only reason I’d ventured out of my bedroom dressed like that was because I had been certain it was late enough that everyone but night owl Shannon would be asleep. How wrong I’d been. By the time I’d realized my mistake, Josh had already seen me, and it had seemed better to brazen it out than to run off like a scared rabbit. We’d even managed to laugh as we talked about video games before we’d fallen into a companionable silence and then I’d promptly fallen asleep.

But knowing that he’d picked me up and carried me when I was practically on display like this… Nope. Brain could not compute, except to decide that from now on I was going to cover up with a grandma muumuu around him.

I allowed myself one last, lazy stretch before getting out of bed. The only thing I clearly remembered from Josh’s midnight taxi servicewas how good it felt to be nestled against him. Even though catching feelings was officially off-limits, I was sort of bummed that I hadn’t been more awake to savor the sensation of his arms around me. It was one of the things I loved when we were together, the way he could sweep me up and make me feel safe.

I caught my reflection in the mirror.

Porn star. I looked like a porn star welcoming the pizza guy before getting down for a zesty session. I cringed.

How was I going to face Josh?

My first priority was changing into something that covered all of the goods. I fished my favorite black T-shirt from the drawer and my jeans with the rips along both knees. Safe, comfortable, and boring. Good.

But then I realized there was no need to face Josh right away. Lost Valley Ranch was big enough for the two of us, and I could work in my bedroom instead of the kitchen until I got over my mortification. I had enough to keep me busy, and I could stay holed up for a day or two if necessary, only coming out to grab some food and use the bathroom.

Just like I used to in my old apartment.

I refused to dwell on the weirdness I’d left behind, knowing full well my former roommates had pointed out my night owl tendencies only to embarrass me. They could have simply told me the truth—that they had someone they wanted to live with who wasn’t me. It wasn’t as if I was on the lease. I huffed out a breath and reminded myself that it was in the past. The very recent past and it still stung, but still, it was behind me now. Now all I had to worry about was thecurrentweirdness with Josh, which was complicated by the fact that hiding in my room wasn’t practical. I needed breakfast and coffee, and I had no idea where he might be lurking in the house or on the property. Imight be able to make it in and out of the kitchen without running into him, but there was no way of finding out for sure until I tried.

Ugh, he was probably in his office, which was right next to the kitchen and totally unavoidable. I slipped off my flip-flops so I could tiptoe past without him hearing me.

I felt like I was inMission Impossibleas I got closer to his office, pausing to listen for sounds of work. His keyboard clacking was hard to miss, so I took a deep breath and made a break for it. I was nearly home free when my phone pealed with what sounded like a dozen text messages in a row. I froze and shut my eyes as I found myself perfectly framed in the doorway.

Josh spun around in his chair, a smile already on his face. “Well, good morning! Sleep well?”

There was no mistaking the twinkle in his eye and the wise-ass expression on his face. I felt my heart speed up at the sight of him looking so damn perfect. The smile that was straight out of a toothpaste ad. I hated that he still had the ability to make me feel off-kilter with just a glance.

“Yup, like a rock,” I answered, raising my chin.

“Yeah, I didn’t remember you being such a sound sleeper. Weird.”

I felt my cheeks go red at the implication. Was he referencing the times we used to sneak away together for trysts by the lake, then fall asleep in the grass?

“I’m not sure if you realize this, Josh, but the body’s circadian rhythms are different post-sex than they are on a normal night’s sleep. Sexual activity leads to a deeper, more restful sleep for men but less so for women.”

Josh’s eyes went wide, and he let out a little choke-cough. I realized my misstep when he didn’t say anything back.Crap. The sister thing.He’d said he thought of me as a sister now. And I’d just made things weird by referencing our sexual history.

“Anyway, I’m gonna grab some breakfast. Bye.” I waved awkwardly at him, then slumped away to die of embarrassment.

Once the bread was in the toaster, I pulled out my phone to see who was blowing it up. A few of my colleagues had sent links to a new grad school program promoted by Elizabeth Curtis, a maverick female programmer who’d paved the way for women in STEM. I had always looked up to her, and after checking out the program, I had to admit that it looked good—maybe even better in some ways than the programs I was applying for already. The site touted the fact that the program was online only, making it a great option for people who couldn’t uproot their lives to pursue their degree.

I frowned. Iwantedto uproot my life. Turn it all upside down, because the way I’d been doing things wasn’t working. I needed to get back to a space full of people like me. Then and only then would I finally feel settled and comfortable. I clicked out of the site and got down to the business of breakfast. I really needed to get my head on straight around Josh if I had any hope of surviving at Lost Valley without going all swoony on him.

I was deep in thought, sipping my coffee and eating the last of my toast when Shannon breezed into the kitchen and headed straight for the coffee pot. She reached for a travel cup and poured the coffee into it before topping it off with too much flavored creamer. Yawning wide enough to make her jaw crack, she took a big gulp, then turned around and leaned against the counter and looked at me.

“Good morning, Sunshine,” I told her in a singsong. She grunted in response and drank more coffee. I tried not to grin. Shannon could be an absolute grump in the mornings if she didn’t get enough sleep and it seemed that this was one of those mornings, which surprised me since she’d gone to bed before me.

---