Page 42 of Every Hidden Truth

“You’re not sorry.”

Smiling like the cat who got the cream, I shook my head. “I don’t think I’ll ever be sorry for giving you a boner.”

Giddy, I opened the paper bag and clapped my hands in delight at the logo on the Styrofoam cups nestled inside. The drive-in was my favorite place to get blue moon shakes, and I pushed aside the chocolate shake to retrieve what I hoped was exactly that.

I was not disappointed. The fresh, sweet flavor burst over my tongue, and I sighed in contentment.

“You’re too good for me.” I took another deep pull from my straw then licked my lips.

Ben’s eyes dropped to my mouth, and he grunted wordlessly.

We ate our burgers and fries in silence, Ben nursing the chocolate shake as I gulped down my blue moon deliciousness. When he had only his shake to occupy his mouth, I disposed of our trash and dumped the last drops of blue moon ice cream into my mouth before tossing the cup into the garbage as well.

“Thanks for getting me a blue moon shake, even though I’m a cocktease.” I rounded the table, circling behind him. My hands followed the path of his broad shoulders, massaging the musclesof his neck before I wrapped my arms around him. “For real, you’re too good for me.”

“I wish you wouldn’t say that.” He brought one of my palms to his mouth, kissing me sweetly, and I smiled into his shoulder. “But next time, don’t try to sext me when I’m at practice.”

“Oh, so we’re allowed to sext now? Good to know.” I kissed his neck, and he harrumphed in exasperation.

“I might be terrible at sexting, you know? And you won’t want to date me anymore.” He craned his neck to meet my gaze, the waves in his eyes splashing playfully.

Using my grip on his neck, I tugged him toward the living room. He rose from the table and followed me to the couch. “If you’re bad at sexting, I won’t hold it against you. I’m sure it takes practice. I mean, sex sucks the first couple times, but it gets better as long as you keep trying.”

As expected, his cheeks flushed at the topic of sex. “If you say so.”

He sat down as I paused, narrowing my eyes before slowly crawling into his lap. “Is that amy-first-time-was-great-so-I’ll-have-to-take-your-word-for-itcomment or aI-wouldn’t-know-because-I’ve-never-done-itcomment?”

Unamused, he cocked an eyebrow as his neck colored to match his cheeks. “If you have something to ask me, just ask me.”

Virginity in general was a scam, something religion and society used to control and shame. But I’d just assumed that Ben had slept with other people. He was crazy attractive and kind; who wouldn’t want to sleep with him?

But the way he avoided eye contact and flushed red as a fire truck made me question my assumptions.

“Have you not had sex before?” I blurted, and his fingers on my waist tightened.

“Would that bother you?” he murmured so quietly I almost missed the vulnerable question.

I blew a raspberry. “No. Does it bother you that I have?”

“No,” he said.

“Okay. I mean, I don’t really buy into the whole status of virginity or whatever, but I get that it can be important to some people.” I shifted uncomfortably in his lap. “Is that important to you?”

He licked his lips, eyes trained on my chin as he swallowed heavily. “No, I agree about the whole virginity being kind of bullshit. And I’m not, like—I mean, I had a boyfriend but we didn’t exactly… uh...”

His stuttering was kind of cute, and I bit back a smile as I asked, “So you have had sex before?”

“Depends on what you mean by sex. It’s so broad.”

I rolled my eyes. “Um, have you ever had penetrative sexual intercourse?”

Immediately recoiling, he blanched. “Oh my God, why would you call it that?”

“You’re making me call it that!”

“Yes,” he admitted, shifting beneath me as he fidgeted with the hem of my shirt. “Yes, I’ve had sex.”

I laughed. “Then what are we even talking about?”