Page 53 of Only Some Stars Fall

“I know… I know.”

We saton the shore for a long time while my panic attack dissipated. We devoured our lunches. Panic attacks always leave me drained, so I welcomed the food and can of soda, giving me a bit of a boost.

Eventually, Hux made some smart-ass comment about bringing me out here to teach me how to fly fish, not to sit on the riverbank and cry. The joke was what I needed. The last few days have been so heavy with us, and I wanted today to be fun. I was thankful for his ability to switch the mood back to our snarky banter.

After about an hour of lessons and more smart-ass comments about menotbeing a natural fisherman, I finally started to catch on.

Fly fishing is surprisingly relaxing, almost meditative. The repetitive nature of casting and keeping my eyes on the river makes it hard to think about anything else, and with every movement, I feel my body and mind settle a bit more.

“I think I’m getting the hang of it!” I yell to Hux, who is downstream from me. I cast my fly rod forward and back in a continuous motion, as Hux showed me earlier.

“Hey, Hey! Look!” Hux whisper-shouts, pointing across the river as a moose steps out to get a drink of water from the flowing water. A second or two later, a moose calf steps out to her right and starts doing the same.

I watch in wonder, not moving an inch. Never in my life did I see myself here. Standing in a river, surrounded by nature with absolutely no other souls in sight except for Hux, me, and this mother/baby duo.

As the moose and calf move on, I walk downstream closer to Hux. “I get it now.”

“Get what?” His eyes are still on his rod.

“Why people travel from all over to come here, to experience this, I understand now.” All he does is smile at me. The sunlight hits the strands of gold in his dirty-blond hair, making them shine. I notice the bit of stubble that peppers his jawline, evidence that he skipped his morning shave. He is so good-looking, that I can’t help but feel my body respond, wanting him, not just for his looks but for the way he has shown up for me in vulnerable moments. I have never experienced anything like that from a guy.

“We’ve been here all afternoon. Are you feeling ready to head back to Anderson’s? I have to work in about an hour, and it will take us a little while to get back to the main road.”

I lick my lips, my cheeks blushing as I think about one thing I want to do before we get back to the resort. I bite my lip while slightly nodding my head. I can tell he knows exactly what’s crossing my mind as he hurries to gather our belongings.

He stops just as we are about to head into the canopy of trees and picks up a small rock like I’ve seen him do a million times before. He inspects it and then turns back to the river. The water is calmer here, stretching out for a long distance with no rapids. He holds the rock between his thumb and forefinger. Pulling his arm back, he throws the rock sideways. When it hits the water, it jumps up and hits the water again and again, jumping up every time it makes contact.

“Is that why you are constantly putting rocks in your pockets?”

“Why else would I? When you see the perfect skipping rock, you can’t leave it behind. That would be a sin.” He laughs, turning back toward the truck and ascending the small banking.

By the time we reach his truck, I am already pulling my shirt over my head. He throws the fishing rods and cooler in the back, and as soon as he turns around, I reach for the buttons on his flannel. It takes him less than a second to respond to my attack, cupping my chin and bringing my lips to his. This kiss is feral and hungry, our fears of being separated at the forefront of our minds.

Pushing me up against the passenger side of the truck, he opens the door while never removing his mouth from my body. The only break in the hunger that is consuming us is when he stops to unbutton and push my shorts down my legs before undoing his own. His lips crash back into mine as he shuffles us to the cab of the truck. With one swift movement, Hux turns me around and bends me over the seat of his truck. A second later, I feel him enter me, and we are once again lost and consumed in each other.

I’m cuddledup next to Hux as we make our way out of the impossibly bumpy road. My arm slung across his stomach, his arm draped over me, and my head on his chest, basking in the heat radiating off him and listening to his heartbeat.

The truck slows, and I lift my head slightly to see if we have found tar again, but instead, Hux is pulling the truck to the side of the road in front of a sunny patch of bushes.

“Hungry?” he asks.

“Um… is that a trick question? We are in the middle of the woods?” I look around. A pop-up shop or food truck would be a little extreme, even for the hippest of hipsters.

He just laughs, opening the truck door and pulling me out along with him. “This is one of the best patches of wild raspberries around. We always stop on our way back from fishing. Fishing can work up quite the appetite, you know?” He smirks, and my cheeks flush.

Hux pops a fresh raspberry in my mouth, and it’s an explosion of flavor, tart and sweet, and unlike any grocery store raspberry I’ve ever tasted.

“Wow, that’s amazing.” I lean down and start gathering a small handful of the delicious fruit.

“I know, right. I swear the bears know it too. This has always been the best place to spot one.”

I freeze. Mid-chew, a raspberry in my hand on its way to my mouth is now frozen in mid-air. Then I remember our hike. He’s trying to scare me again, and I’m not falling for it this time.

“Nice try. You already tried that on me, remember?” But my eyes still dart from left to right, the rest of me paralyzed in fear.

That familiar cocky chuckle escapes Hux. “It’s Maine’s North Woods, of course there are bears, but they are a lot more scared of us than we are of them. They won’t bother us.”

I take a deep breath and cautiously start to chew again.

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