Page 128 of Seeing Grayscale

“I do.”

“Are you going to just stare, or are you going to do something about it?”

It’s meant to be playful, but it sends me a crushing punch of dread. With a clearer head and time to process throughout the morning, I have found what I hope is neutral ground.

A way to pacify my dad and keep Gray for longer.

I just have todo it.

Get off my ass, get in my car, anddo it.

“Hunter?” He’s looking at me now. Carefully closing his sketchbook, he gets down from the window seat and walks over to me. Gentle hands gather my cheeks and tilt my face up. “What’s wrong?”

I palm his hips, guiding him closer. “I need more time.”

“Time?”

“I can’t tell him yet.” Gray frowns. “I’m not ready. But I think I have a solution.”

One of his dark eyebrows arches, making me swallow hard.

“I’ll tell my dad part of the truth—that I’m helping you. And then…I’ll tell him the rest later. After this has blown over and…”

“What about Xavier?”

I blink. “What about him?”

“He wants your company. He’s the reason you’re even in this position. What if he tellseverything?” He drops his hands from my face, crossing his arms over his chest. “Hunter, you can’t keep pussy-footing around this.”

“You expect me to just come out?” I bark. “Just like that? Afteryearsandyearsof hiding it? I can’t do that, Gray. I can’t.”

“You told me you’d try!” Aggressively stepping out of my hold, his face contorts between anguish and rage. “Do I need to get a job? Have a place to live? Would that matter? I mean, I think it would—no one wants to bring ahomelessdude home to meet their family.”

“Gray…”

“Would it matter?” he demands. “Or am I doing all this to prepare for the inevitable?”

I stand, cross the minimal space, and grab his shoulders. “No. Don’t even think that. I’d never make you go.”

“Then?” We’re both stretched thin. He needs constant reassurance that I won’t abandon him, and I need to be enabled. It’s wrong, but I can’t seem to stop it.

“Give me that time, okay? Please, sweetheart. I need more time. That’s all I’m asking.”

He studies me, and the harsh glint in his eyes makes my stomach swoop with worry. “That’s all?”

I nod fast, stepping into his space more and wrapping my arms around his waist. He has no choice but to unfold his. Firmhands land on my chest, and he stares at me for long seconds. The muscles in his jaw flex over and over before hefinallyrelaxes. “Promise me. Promise me that you aren’t just saying this knowing it won’t ever happen. Promise me that everything we’ve done and are doing is real. Promise me that you won’t leave me too.”

“I promise.” The words leave my lips, and he clings to me.

I rub his back while he stuffs his face in the crook of my neck, and we hold each other for long seconds. “I promise,” I whisper again, knowing he needs to hear it.

“I believe you."

I believe me too.

Alex keeps calling me, but I ignore it.

I’m driving to my parent’s house and I have to keep my shit together.

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