Page 153 of Seeing Grayscale

Momma, why did you show me all those movies? It really sets a kid up for failure, you know.

I thought I’d get maybe a mile or two away from the summer house, and Hunter’s car would peel out of the darkness. He’d gather me into his arms and kiss my tear-coated lips, apologizing and swearing he’d never abandon me. He would tell me that people argue, and he’s sorry.

But it didn’t happen.

Two fucking days have gone by and he hasn’t called or texted…

“Fuck.”

I completely forgot to turn my phone back on.

While I dig it out of my pocket, I internally scold Wesley for rescuing Buttercup. I tell Wayne he’s a moron for chasing after Cassandra when she chose that loser manager to spend time with.

And I tell Vivian she forgave Edward way too fucking easily.

A limo and flowers? Really?Bullshit.

No one’s ever gotten me flowers.

I press and hold the power button, and when it lights up, I set it on the bench beside me, letting my head fall into my awaiting hands.

Am I that forgettable? Caleb forgot about me the secondBrockappeared with his suit and big dick. My foster parents never thought about me again once I got the boot and went somewhere else. Vincent and the guys probably high-fived each other when I got taken to jail.

Come to think of it, not a single person I know has ever made me feel like I mattered past a certain point. With Hunter…well, it just wasn’t like that. He made all the little things I do seem monumental. A kiss from me was worth a pile of gold. My companionship seemed to be priceless. And while I know you can’t rely on another person to make you see the worth in yourself, it definitely fucking helps.

My phone dings and buzzes loudly against the metal, but I’m not quite ready to see what scam emails I have yet.

I don’t even know how I get so many. And I have no use for a new mop.

The wind chooses to kick up, blasting me with an icy breeze. I tuck into myself further, blowing on my cold fingers. The steel digging into my ass reminds me of so many days—years—I dealt with the elements. How lonely it got. I miss listening to airplanes and watching those Da Vinci Code movies. I miss warm arms and a firm chest to cuddle up to at night.

Hell, I miss the sound of his breath when he finally fell asleep. And his rumpled face in the morning before he had his coffee.

The subtle touches that let me know he wanted me.

How much green leaked into his irises when he lusted for me.

I miss Hunter so fucking bad and I don’t understand why he doesn’t miss me.

Why didn’t he come after me? Love me?Need me?

Fresh tears spill over my cheeks as I look at the spot I’ve avoided since coming here. The first time I let him see how soft my insides are. When I needed safety more than I ever did, Hunter seemed to forget that we were out in the open for a brief moment. He had wrapped his arms around me, pressed his lips to the top of my head, and my heart cracked wide open. It reached for him like it had never reached for anyone before.

But then he pushed me away.

I wipe my face quickly and pick up my phone. How long before he turns it off? How long before he erases all trace of us? Will he paint the wall in his backyard? Use my sketches as tinder for his bonfire?

I bet he’s taken at least ten showers in the past two days. I bet he’s kissing his dad’s ass, telling that fucked up man what agood sonhe is. That he let something good slip through his fingers because he couldn’t be brave enough to keep it.

Fresh waves of pain and anger consume me as I glare at the phone in my hand, ready to throw it into traffic. But then it buzzes, the screen lighting up.

I swipe up and find all kinds of notifications.

Several texts are waiting, emails, andthreephone calls.

My hands tremble as I clear the emails first—spam, just like I thought—and I swallow hard as I see who called.

“Oh,” I deflate. It was Alex. That’s probably who texted too…

---