Page 66 of Seeing Grayscale

Somehow, I highly doubtthisis what he had in mind.

Fuck, did I mess everything up?

“Tomorrow, I have to join my dad for a press conference. It’ll be early, so I should be done by lunchtime,” he says conversationally. Like, I’m not over here freaking out.

Did he do this with Leonard?Brent?

“Gray?”

I rip my thumb out of my mouth, balling my hand to stifle the sting. “You fucking kissed me,” I snap.

Conveniently, we come to a red light, so he faces me. “I thought—you didn’t say anything. I thought it was okay.”

“You thought it wasokay?” Oh, I’m riled thefuckup right now. “It was justokay?” I seethe.

“Hold on.”

I sit there, glaring at him while he waits for the light to change. When it does, he drives us into the parking lot of a grocery store and stops the car. “What are you upset about right now? The fact I kissed you or that I didn’t talk about it?”

Does he not realize what he said? “Not only should wenotbe doing that in general, but you have the fucking balls to tell me it was okay? That’s it? Fuckin’ mediocre?” I shake my head, pissed beyond relief, and jab my finger into the button to unbuckle.

His hand darts out, gripping my wrist. “Imeantthat I thought it was okay todo it.That you wanted me to. But you said nothing afterward, so I thought I read it wrong. I’ve been trying to figure out how to apologize to you because I crossed a line.”

Aware that I’m insecure and got caught looking for a problem that wasn’t there, I seal my lips. My mom would tear me a new one for not apologizing, and my dad would be disappointed that I was not ‘using my words.’ But, damn it, I’m embarrassed.

Picking up on it, spotting my ruby cheeks, Hunter brushes his thumb over the prominent bone in my wrist.

“I like you, Gray,” he whispers.

Oh, hell.

Peeking up at him, I wiggle my arm so he lets go of me. Once I successfully shield myself with folded arms, I admit the truth. “Me too. I like you too.”

“Nothing about you is mediocre.” His reassurance smooths down my hackles as I nod. “But you’re right,” he breathes, and I snap my attention back to his face. Regret washes his features, making my stomach sink. “We shouldn’t do that again.”

I nod again, too twisted up to trust my voice currently.

I hadn’t meant to say that part out loud; those fears were reserved for me and me alone. But now that they’re out in the open, sinking into Hunter’s view of me, I hate that I even have the damn things.

All that crap I spewed to him about being brave and doing what you want means nothing. It’s a damn lie.

Life doesn’t give a fuck if you’re brave. Hell, it takes it as a challenge.

You wanna be brave? Bet.

You’ll get a reality check so damn fast you won’t even know you’ve been knocked off your feet until you taste gravel.

Last night—this morning, it’s all a stupid delusion. There’s no place in the world where he and I work—not even as friends. And the smart thing to do here isn’t to mope about it. I need to cash in on his offer, get my ID, and figure out how the hell I can get a job and maybe even a place to live. Those might be obtainablewith his help. I’ll get my shit together, he’ll go about his life and find more Brents and Leonards to fuck, and that’ll be it.

Done.

No one gets hurt.

“Hey,” he says gently.

“Yeah?”

“It’s not that I don’t want to.” An apologetic smile. “But you deserve more than I can give you, at least when it comes to that side of things.”

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