Page 82 of Forbidden Desire

“Good morning,” I say.

“We’re matching,” she says with a smirk, looking at my hat.

“Great minds think alike, I guess.” I shrug.

I bend down and say hi to Josie who reaches out for me. I give her my hand and she wraps her tiny fingers around mine, squeezing. She gives me that smile of hers. It’s probably myfavorite thing I’ve ever seen, aside from her mother who now watches us with that same wary expression.

“You okay?” I ask, standing up and looking at her curiously.

She bites her lip and looks at Josie. “It’s just…strange. All of this. It’s going to take some getting used to.”

“I understand.”

I get hung up on the words “getting used to,” like this is something we’ll be doing more often.

“You ready?” she asks, looking toward the gates of the zoo that are being pulled open by two of the zoo staff members.

“Ready.” I smile.

I buy our tickets from the kiosk, politely declining the attendant’s offer of purchasing an annual family pass to save money. The word family catches me off guard, lodging itself in my mind like an ongoing echo. We look the part, but we are far from it. I see it had the same effect on Erica as she awkwardly smiles as I take back my credit card.

I walk alongside her as she pushes Josie along the sidewalk. It’s a beautiful day. The sun is shining, only obstructed by the few white fluffy clouds in the sky. It’s perfect. I breathe in the fresh air and look over at Erica and Josie alongside me.

“What?” she asks, staring ahead.

She used to like when I looked at her, but now she questions it.

“Nothing,” I say, looking ahead.

We stop to see the snow leopard and Erica picks up Josie from the stroller, holding her up to get a better view. I can see she’s struggling slightly.

“May I?” I ask.

She seems to debate it before handing Josie to me, who reaches out to me with no protest. I lift her up and place her on my shoulders. She squeals with delight, her fingers finding my hair and grasping it tightly. I make a pained expression and Erica lets out a giggle.

“Careful. She’s strong. I’ve lost a lot of hair because of her.”

“I’m surprised you’re not bald,” I say, wincing.

Josie eases her grip and watches the snow leopard pace around her enclosure.

“Meow,” says Josie.

“That’s right. A kitty cat,” says Erica, reaching over and tickling Josie’s leg that’s slung over my shoulder. I haven’t been this close to her in weeks. I’ve missed her, longed to touch her. It’shard not to get wrapped up in her, especially because this isn’t a date. This is something else. I don’t know what entirely, but I can only hope it becomes more.

I feel Erica looking up at me and Josie on my shoulders. I swear there are tears forming in her eyes, but she blinks them away and looks back out toward the leopard who has settled on a rock. We move along the pathway to the next exhibit, the polar exhibit.

Josie squirms on my shoulders to get down, so I lift her up and hold her hands as she waddles over to the glass. She lets go of my fingers and presses her hands and face against the glass as the penguins whiz past her, and she giggles like crazy.

“This one’s her favorite,” says Erica, kneeling to see exactly what Josie’s seeing.

I follow suit. We watch the fast, sleek birds glide through the water with ease, every so often slowing down to get a better view of us as if we are the exhibit. I can see why Josie likes them so much. They’re quite the little characters.

On the way out of the exhibit, I stop at a kiosk selling stuffed animal penguins. I buy the biggest one and hand it to Josie who is sitting in her stroller. She looks wide-eyed as she wraps her arms around the stuffie that’s bigger than her.

“You didn’t have to do that,” says Erica.

“I wanted to.”

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