Page 75 of Benidorm Again

I suppose it’s sweet that she is trying to earn their forgiveness. She has been a pain in the neck since we arrived.

‘Okay,’ booms Big Sue. ‘Liberty, pet, want to tell us what is really going on?’

Liberty peers down at her high, strappy sandals and pretends to smooth down her pleather mini dress. She looks spectacular. I take in her show-stopping, limelight-stealing, outrageously skimpy outfit. I’m not the only one admiring what she has done with her hair and make-up.

‘Are those my hold-up Lycra stockings?’asks Tash.

Liberty reaches down and slowly adjusts one of the stocking tops. They somehow make her shiny legs seem even longer. ‘No.’

Tash screws her eyes. ‘And that’s my lip gloss. The mega-plumper in Violent Rouge. I’ve been looking everywhere for it.’

‘So what?’ Liberty says, pouting back.

‘Don’t start,’ booms Big Sue. ‘Let’s just get the fuck on with it. But as soon as we’ve finished, Liberty, you have some explaining to do.’

We troop into Benidorm Palace, barely speaking, like a group of disappointed school kids on a day trip to Butterfly World. While the organisers are falling over themselves to accommodate a group rehearsal, I take a moment to pluck up the courage to leave a voice WhatsApp for Matteo to tell him I’ve seen the news headlines. I’m going to tell Matteo that I am fully understanding, and that he is not to worry one little bit, because I’m not the sort to believe salacious gossip. After all, it would be a bit rich coming from the woman who, only last week, was splashed over the UK tabloids as the Norwegian prince’s bit of rough.

I find a quiet space away from The Dollz doing their soundcheck on stage but just as I take out my phone,Matteo face times me. I accept the call and hold the phone up to a flattering angle.

‘Oh wow,’ he says, his eyes mushrooming.

I blush instantly.

‘Good luck for tonight,’ he says, realising where I am. ‘I’m just calling to explain… in case you saw, erm, some news about…’

I smile at his discomfort. ‘It’s okay. I understand.’ We smile goofily at one another. ‘I had the same issues last week in the tabloids. It’s all rubbish. Comes with the territory, I suppose.’

Pah! Like we’re minor celebrities!

He sighs with relief and gives me another incredulous look. ‘I thought you’d be… anyway, it’s good to see you again.’ His eyes sparkle, and his whole face is lit up. He totally has the hots for me.

‘How long have you got?’ I ask.

‘A few minutes.’

I come over all Dollz-like and daring. I’m going to execute what The Dollz frequently call their HOT GARBAGE routine. Apparently, it never fails. After a quick peek around to make sure no one is watching, I smile in a flirty way. ‘How do you like my outfit?’ I tilt the phone and trail it slowly down to my cleavage, which is squashedinto the world’s tightest spandex dress. Down over my flat, bare stomach to my legs. I perch the phone on a nearby table while I place my high-heeled sandal provocatively on the chair and run my hand the length of my stocking and just like in my Birdie nightmares, I slip my finger into the top of it before snapping it back into place French floozy-style. I drag the phone sexily back up to my face. Matteo’s jaw is hanging open. But not in a good way.

I peer at the screen. Something feels odd. There’s an arm over his shoulder and some salmon-pink hair hanging down.

Oh my God.I instantly bristle. He’s not alone.

‘You must be Connie.’

I hide my surprise as Birdie’s beautiful, large, turquoise blue eyes, slender nose, and full lips come into view.

‘I, erm, well,’ I stammer.How could Matteo not tell me we weren’t alone? Wouldn’t you start with that?

‘Good to meet you at last,’ laughs Birdie, coming back into view, cool salmon-pink hair piled messily up on her head. ‘Great legs.’

I feel my face flame.

‘I guess you need to get some air to yourself,’ laughs Birdie. ‘Rubber skirts? Am I right?’

I close my eyes andpray for an early death. But when I open them a second later, she’s still there smiling at me. She has perfect teeth and a smile twice as wide as any normal human woman.

I hear Matteo clear his throat and muscle back into the shot. I notice Birdie leaves her arm draped over him. ‘Sorry. She snuck up on me,’ he apologises. I must look shell-shocked. ‘So, we have to go. But it was great to see you.’

He sounds all brisk and formal. I am mortified. There’s no mention of my sexy leg stroking.Why? Why did I do it?

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