Page 2 of Embers in the Outfield

I give a small nod, and he sets me down on a bed. The tears start to stream down my cheeks, and I’m worried that nothing will be the same ever again.

It feels like life is moving in slow motion around me. The people who saw the accident, plus others who are coming out of their houses, have horrified expressions on their faces.

I feel the cold of the stethoscope on my skin while a woman starts talking to me.

“Hi. I’m Jackie. Can you tell me if anything hurts?”

I’m sitting there for a few minutes, the tears still falling, as I see the firemen moving around me and trying to help not only my parents but the people in the truck that hit us.

One of the firemen comes up to Jackie and whispers, but his words carry, and I hear words that make no sense to me. “Her parents are DOA. Waiting on the coroner to arrive. The guy in the truck looks to have dislocated his shoulder from what I can tell. Trevor is with him now to look him over.”

The lady, Jackie, nods, and I see sadness on her face. I should tell my mommy I don’t want Jackie as a baby name either. I don’t want any names that remind me of today.

“Alright, sweetie. Is there anywhere on your body that hurts?” I give a little nod, trying to keep from screaming because I just want my mommy. Jackie continues, “Can you point to where on your body you’re in pain?”

I stare at the scene in front of me for a few extra seconds, hoping my mommy and daddy start to get up and out of the smashed car. I stare for so long, I think I’m trying to make my thoughts come to life.

I hear the paramedic’s throat clear, and that snaps my attention back to her. I point over my chest, rubbing at that area. My heart hurts. That’s the only thing that hurts right now.

My heart, which will never feel the same, is forever changed from one second in the wrong place. It’s in that moment I realize that most of my heart died in that car today, along with my parents, on this warm Tuesday in September.

CHAPTER 1

River

13 YEARS LATER

“So what’s sogreat about this girl?” I can’t help but ask Ashton as we walk through his fraternity house.

The music is blaring, and it’s hard for me to even hear my own thoughts. I promised Ash I would visit when I had a break, and this was the only time I could hang out with my best friend since we parted ways this past summer. It’s now November, and a long weekend is upon us.

“Dude, she’s the most beautiful girl I’ve ever seen. I don’t know how to describe it. Like the world vanished when we locked eyes.” I have to control the reflex of rolling my eyes as my closest friend gushes about this new girl he started dating.

“Okay, let me rephrase. What makes her different than all the other girls you’ve dated? I mean, Ash, my man, I know how big your heart is, but you have a tendency to look at every girl and see forever with her.”

Ashton Caldon is a hopeless romantic. He’s the golden retriever of our group, and it seems that title remains the same, even in college. My brother and I have teased him about it since we were in kindergarten.

“It’s not like all the other times. You and Clay will meet her and see what I’m talking about.” He’s yelling over his shoulder as we make our way through the fraternity house he just got initiated into this semester.

Clay is my twin brother, who likes to hold it over my head that he’s older by two minutes. Who knew one hundred and twenty seconds could hold so much power between siblings? We’re what people refer to as mirror twins, where our features are identical but mirrored between one another.

Unfortunately, he won’t be here to see our best friend, once again, throw all caution to the wind for this current love interest of his. Clay was supposed to drive up here with me, but he had a paper to finish before Thanksgiving break. He stayed behind in Boston, and I’ll drive back home with Ash in the next few days for the holiday.

“It’s like I have an ache in my chest when she’s not around. I can’t even find words to describe it.” Does he have hearts in his eyes right now as he gazes off, thinking of this chick?

“You’re fucked, man. I can’t wait to tell Clay about this.” I grab a bottle of beer and slap my friend on the shoulder. “Is she here yet? I need to see this girl who swept you off your feet.” I want to add, ‘Until the next one’, but hold it in.

“She texted me saying she’s grabbing drinks. She’s probably in the kitchen. I know she brought her roommate. You have to promise me to be on your best behavior.” With that, Ash looks at me, his expression growing serious as he points his finger at me.

“I’m always on my best behavior.” I smile, the dimples popping out to show I truly am loving and innocent—most of the time.

“Don’t give me that, Riv. You and I both know you are what most would deem a man-whore. You fuck anything with two legs. At least that’s how you were all summer. Has that changed?”

“Well, that hostility is uncalled for. Just because I have fun doesn’t make it bad. Plus, after that shit Kailey pulled last year, I’m sort of within my right to have some fun. I mean, she fucked Benson at the party. And of all people, he was our fucking friend. And let’s be fair—my brother is worse than me, and he’s been that way far longer,” I say somewhat defensively.

“What Kailey did was fucking shitty, I get that. But not everyone is Kailey,” he adds, understanding in his eyes.

Kailey Davis was my high school girlfriend. While I was captain of the lacrosse team, she was the head cheerleader. Yes, while it’s usually the football quarterback who ends up with the cheerleader, I was the one who did. And I felt lucky until I didn’t.

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