Page 26 of Embers in the Outfield

“Hey, Skipper. Miss me?” His confidence is palpable, and I’m just standing there, taking him in.

He’s changed since I saw him at Sam and Ash’s place. He’s got some dark denim pants on, a clean V-neck shirt, with a leather jacket. He has bad boy written all over him, and I have to stop from salivating.

I look down at my watch. “Not as much as you must have. Nine on the dot. Must be antsy to see me.” Hoping I sound more confident than I feel.

He moves toward me, and out of instinct, I move back, not sure how to maneuver through this new path between us. I’ve spent years dodging his words and hoping none of them stuck. But now all I want is to stand in the way of all his words and feel them take over my body the way that orgasm did when we were in my hotel room.

“You didn’t answer my question,” he says, moving closer to my ear. The goosebumps that erupt along my arms are unstoppable and do not go unnoticed by either of us.

He’s got me against a wall, my open door forgotten in the kitchen at this point, his eyes pinning me with his stare. I look straight at him, wondering what his next move is.

He slowly brings his right hand up my body, careful not to connect to any portion of me. Soon, his palm goes around my neck, not enough pressure to cut off my airway, nor does it feel threatening. The only feeling it does bring is heat to my core and a spike in my heart rate.

“By the feel of that pulse of yours, you’re just as excited to see me, Kennedy. So tell me, did you miss me?” I feel his breath against my face, and all I want is for those plump lips of his to take over and kiss me already.

Knowing he’s expecting words and not actions as a response, I decide to throw him off his game, even for a second. I grab his shirt and tug him so he’s flush with me, and I plant my lips to his.

The moment we connect, the same feeling as this afternoon consumes my senses. It almost feels like all the moments Ithought I was living a fulfilling life come crashing down. I know in this instant, each step forward will never be the same because I know what it’s like to be consumed by River Nichols.

He brings both hands to hold my face, and he deepens the kiss, and I swear I see stars. He’s only kissed me at this point, and all my big moments in life already feel insignificant compared to this one.

He puts his hands behind my thighs and hoists me up. I wrap my legs around his middle, and I feel his dick at my center, ready for attention. He’s moving me through the house, never pulling away. My breath is his, and this control he has over my movements is his to take.

We’re going into the hallway when I remember the mental pep talk I had before he arrived and find the strength to pull my lips off of his.

“River, hold up. Wait,” I say, and he stops, keeping me in his arms but looking conflicted as his gaze meets mine.

“Scared?” We might be crossing into new territory together, but he reverts to his playful banter with me like we’d usually do.

“Honestly, yes. Aren’t you?” I hear the seriousness in my tone, and I can’t help the ice bucket this feels like I’ve doused over both of us.

I undo my legs from around him and let my feet connect to the ground again.

“I mean, I have no doubt what we’d do in there would be epic.” I nudge my head toward my bedroom. “I mean, years of pent-up frustration coming together. I can guarantee it would be explosive. But I’m not sure I can handle ruining multiple friendships if this turns out to be a huge mistake between two people. We have Ashton and Samara to consider. If this blows up in our faces, we could potentially ruin four friendships, not just two.” The moment I say it, he starts to walk off toward the couch,but I catch his hand and interlace my fingers. He pulls me with him toward the couch. He sits, pulling me onto his lap.

“River, I want to do this with you, but I’m scared about what this means. I think you and I can agree we like keeping things casual. But I’m well aware nothing about us together can be casual. We’re always on the verge of destruction when we are in the same room. Plus, we aren’t strangers who have just met. We have years of history, even if it’s volatile.”

It’s true. My relationship with River, aside from what I have with Samara, is probably the most constant thing in my life. Although the word constant is more in the sense of wanting to rip each other’s heads off, it’s still something I’ve come to expect. I don’t know if I put much weight on that fact until this very moment.

“The thing is, once we move from enemies to whatever this is, it has the potential of destroying everything,” I say, fearing we may already be threatening this whole thing with what we’ve done.

“It also has the potential of being everything,” he says immediately and brings his lips to kiss me right under my ear, a place I didn’t know triggered so much heat within my body.

It’s then I realize how comforting this side of River is for me. This side where I don’t get his jagged edges and he doesn’t get mine. I want that side of him to be mine more than I ever imagined.

I move my face away to give him more access to this part of my body, and he takes it. He begins to leave open-mouth kisses on my skin, and I feel like he’s setting me on fire. When his lips reach mine, we deepen our connection with another searing kiss. I bring my arms around his neck, caressing that soft spot of hair on the back of his head.

Once we pull apart, he gives me his full attention.

“I get it, Kennedy. I know how you’re feeling because for months now, I’ve been fighting this tug I’ve felt toward you.” His confession catches me by surprise. “It’s true. For the last few months, I’ve wanted to touch you, feel you squirm with my touch. I’ve wanted to explore this thing that seems to be simmering, and if I don’t try with you, I may seriously boil over.”

I can’t help the laugh that escapes me.

“I can’t pretend I know how this turns out. But I do know that I crave your presence instead of fighting it lately. I don’t know what switched, but it’s happening, and I think it would be a disservice to us both not to explore it further. If you tell me right now you can’t do this without getting deeper feelings involved, I understand,” he explains as he rubs his hands in circles over my hips. “Please don’t mistake my need to be with you as taking all the other things that could happen lightly.”

He continues, “I get it. You’re scared, and you have every right to be.” He moves a piece of hair behind my ear that fell out of my messy bun.

“So what should we do about it?”

---