Page 72 of Outspoken

I lift her fingers to my lips and kiss them. “Well, I’m happy you’re safe. I’m happy to be out here enjoying this peaceful night with you.”

She tips her head back, angling her mouth toward mine and gazing at my lips. She trails a finger along my jaw, trying to entice me to kiss her.

Damn, I want to. With the stars overhead, the gentle breeze, and the serenade of crickets, this is the perfect, romantic moment to express ourselves. This is a soulmate story you tell your grandkids and pass on for generations.

I clench my jaw, fighting an internal battle—to give in to these feelings or to uphold the bro code. I run a thumb over Amber’s cheek, and she parts her lips—such kissable, full lips.

Dammit. I can’t. It has to be the bro code. I can’t risk pissing off Brody and losing a prospective job. I really need cash for Mom’s care. I also shouldn’t be getting involved with anyone when Mom needs my full attention. She comes first.

I lower my hand to a respectable place on my knee and ask, “How are you feeling?”

“Feeling how? Like what? I’m having a nice time with this hot guy I met.” She closes her eyes for a moment and grimaces.

“Cramps?”

Her eyes pop open. “What? God, you heard? Oh god…” She laughs, hiding her face with her palms.

I smile, brushing the hair off her forehead. Her body is so soft against mine.This is torture.“What’s it matter? It’s natural.”

“Because men…guys get weird.” She blinks heavily at me. “That’s why, huh? You’re holding back. I grossed you, um, out.”

“No, it’s not that.”

“Then what?”

I shift so I’m more settled on the bench and can gaze up at the stars. “I’d tell you if I could. Just know that I think you’re beautiful and I’d really love to kiss you. But there are reasons I can’t.”

She also shifts so she can look at the sky, still snuggled against me. “You’re not at all what I’m used to.”

“How’s that?”

“I’ve had guys step in to 'save me' at parties. Like, I stumble and they catch me. Or, when a creeper gets in my space, another guy makes him leave. But they step in, um, because they expect something. Like, because they helped me, I should fuck them.” She traces my pecs again. “Here you are not even trying to make out.”

I rest my cheek against the top of her head, inhaling her intoxicating floral scent to keep me in the moment. I don’t like thinking about her being in risky situations with guys trying to take advantage like that. “I just wanted to make sure you were safe. If you get harassed so much at parties, maybe you should stop going.”

“Hmm, can't do that. I need parties. They keep me sane. And dating jerks is my special power. That’s what I deserve anyway—certainly not a guy like you.”

“That’s not true.” I stroke her hair, hoping it’s only the alcohol giving her this low self-esteem. I hope she doesn’t really believe she deserves crappy men.

She sighs, her mood dropping. “Sorry I won’t remember this…won’t remember you. No offense. My memory is crap after parties. Um, one sec.” She stands suddenly and darts into the bushes nearby, managing not to stumble.

A moment later, I hear a lot of heaving and unpleasant gurgling sounds. She returns after several minutes, fluffing her hair and sitting stiffly on the bench. “Ignore that. It was gross.”

I bust out laughing, and she looks at me warily. “Damn,” I say. “I love how you speak your mind with no apologies given. It was probably good we weren’t kissing, considering how you wrecked those bushes.”

She blushes, relaxing back into my side. “Yeah. Sorry.”

I rest an arm along her shoulders and she reaches up to interlock our fingers, rubbing her thumb across my palm.

Time passes and neither of us feels the need to speak. It’s enough just sitting beside one another, gazing up at the stars. I’ve never felt this kind of peace. I never want it to end.

When a streak of light flashes overhead, I point. “Shooting star.”

“Mmm, I saw. Guess we make a wish.”

“You got one?”

Her body sags as if the world suddenly became more real and the shadows more threatening. Her soft words cut through the night air. “I wish for a time machine, so I can go back and fix everything.” She tips her head up to look at me, not hiding the tears pooling in her eyes. “Yours?”

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