Page 78 of Outspoken

“No, my clients should be fine,” he says. “Paige and I decided to do our trip next week. My schedule has more openings, so it's a better time to go. Giving you a heads up.”

“Oh, got it. You're still driving up the coast? How long you going for?”

“Yeah. About a week and a half…And you probably know what I'm going to ask.”

It takes me a second of staring into space before the realization hits. If Paige and Brody are going out of town, then…

The weight of the world presses down on my shoulders as I nod to myself. “You want me to watch Amber,” I say dryly.Like this will help her be less pissed at me.

“If you can, I'd appreciate it. I know you have a lot going on, and I don’t know what happened between you two, but I’m worried she’s spiraling. Haven’t seen her act this way for a while. I wasn't going to ask you, but after we booked the non-refundable hotel room, I found out both Jackie and Frank will be gone the same two days next week. That’s when I want you to check on Amber. Just say 'hi' on Friday or Saturday and make sure she’s okay. Doesn't matter if she talks to you, just make sure she's home safe.”

I close my eyes, simply exhausted. Amber's pained, teary expression flashes behind my eyelids.

“No one trusts me or has faith in me to succeed.”

Opening my eyes, I say to Brody, “Do you think all of this babysitting hurts her more than it helps? We could give her our trust.”

His words are edgy when he responds, “I’ve seen Amber like this enough times to know the consequences of not watching her. I’d rather she hates all of us than hurt herself. Wouldn’t you?”

My heart drops and I stare at the beige tile. “Of course.”

He sighs. “Maybe we should cancel this trip. Play it safe.”

“No, you've been planning this for a while. I'll check on Amber while you're gone. Since she’s talking to Paige a little, maybe you two can get on better terms with her before the trip. It'll give you some peace of mind.”

In a hard monotone, he says, “So you and Paige have been texting.”

I freeze. “Is this a reason for you to kick my ass?”

He releases a puff of air, and I hear a slight smile in his words. “No, but I don't know why you're both being secretive. Guess because it's about Amber.”

“We don't tell you because you're salty.”

“I’m trying to look out for everyone. Seems my concerns are valid.”

He falls silent, giving me a few moments to soak in his words. They soak in too deep, reminding me of my foolishness and how disappointed I am with my actions.

“I don't want to kick your ass,” he says firmly, “but I will if you hurt my sister. I knew the two of you together would be a disaster, but I didn’t imagine it like this.”

I can’t lie to my best bro, so I give him the truth. “I did hurt her, but I don't want to make those mistakes again. I’m working on myself, and I want to work through this with Amber. If she lets me.”

“Work through it soon.”

“I will.”

We end our convo, and I drop my phone on a pile of magazines on the coffee table. I position myself so my head is resting on Mom's knees again.

“You're right,” I say to her. “I'm never too old for this, especially when being an adult is so complicated. Can I go back to being a kid, please?”

“Sí,” she says, patting my hair. Her voice is airy and loving, like an angel pouring white light into my soul. “I will take away all your sadness. Just trust, mi cielito. Trust and it will all work out.”

Chapter Twenty

Amber

AS THE STUDENT AIDE PASSES by my chair desk, she slides my essay face-down in front of me. I glance around the Writing 101 classroom as others review their own essays. I hesitantly place my fingers on the stapled sheets of paper, not yet ready to face my grade. This 1,000-word essay was a pain, but I put absolutelyeverythingI had into it. I re-read the chapter about research essays three times, looked up way more articles than necessary for my topic about prescription drug abuse among college students, and I even visited the tutoring center. A tutor reviewed my essay and gave me plenty of great tips.

This damn essay was written, edited, re-written, and peer-reviewed. The tutor even used the word ‘phenomenal’ after looking at my final draft.

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