Page 147 of Ugly Beautiful Scars

"Not really. I think I need to stop somewhere. Maybe get some medicine."

His hand tightens around mine and he glances over with worry twisting his features even more. "What's wrong?"

"Oh, nothing. Just feeling off. Could be stress, could be the long flight." I exhale and try to relax into my seat. "Maybe some antacids and electrolyte water would help."

"I'll find a place to stop."

As Sean pulls off the freeway, searching for a gas station, I wonder if there will ever be a time when we're just… us. When we're not running or hiding or fighting.

I lean over and press my lips to his shoulder. He glances at me, and I see everything there, all the words we haven't said. Along with the fear that we'll never get our chance together.

"There's a station up ahead," he says, slowing the car. "Let's get you what you need."

The gas station is a small oasis of fluorescent light against the darkening California sky. Sean parks near the entrance, and before I can reach for the door handle, he's already out and coming around to my side.

"I'll come with you," he says, sliding his hand into mine as we walk toward the convenience store.

The automatic doors slide open with a hiss, and we step into the dull, flickering light and refrigerated air. The aisles are narrow but the store doesn't have many customers. I head straight for the medicine section while Sean's eyes sweep the store. There's only a bored-looking cashier scrolling through his phone and an elderly man studying the coffee options.

I grab antacids, pain relievers, and a bottle of electrolyte water. The cramps in my abdomen twist my insides, and I press my hand against my stomach.

Crap.I wonder if it's time for my period. Just what I need…

"Got everything?" Sean asks, eyes still moving, always scanning.

"I think so."

He takes the items from my hands. "I'll pay, but"—his fingers hook under my chin and tip my head—"You okay?"

"Yeah, just need to use the bathroom."

He hesitates, and I see the conflict in his eyes, the need to keep me in sight battling with my obvious discomfort.

"I'll be right out," I assure him. "A few minutes."

He nods, and I slip away toward the restrooms at the back of the store, feeling his gaze follow me until I disappear around the corner.

The bathroom is surprisingly clean for a gas station. It's small but well-lit, with two tiny stalls. I lock the stall door behind me and lean against it for a moment, trying to breathe through another wave of cramping.

After I use the bathroom, I don't find any signs of my period, so I pull out my phone and open my period tracking app. It might be those odd phantom cramps I get one or two days before my period actually arrives. I scroll back through the calendar and freeze.

According to the app, I'm nearly one month late.

That can't be right. I try to remember my last period, but the weeks have blurred together since Sean entered my life. The stalkers, the kidnapping, Victor… it's all become a haze punctuated only by moments of clarity in Sean's arms.

I stare at the screen, and my stomach twists from dread this time. Sometimes my body skips a cycle when I'm under extreme stress, and God knows I've been stressed. But as I stand there, a different possibility nibbles at my mind.

All those nights with Sean. All that passion with nothing between us. That conversation where I mentioned no birth control and he said he was okay with it.

We've been pretty reckless when it comes to protection. Meaning, we've used zero. I just never expected either of us to bethisfertile. Some people try for more than a year before succeeding.

I rest my hand on my abdomen, feeling the warmth beneath my skin in a new way. Could I be…? Here, now, in the middle of this nightmare?

It has to be a mistake. I must have forgotten to log my last period or it's just stress making it super late.

I need to be sure.

When I step out of the bathroom, Sean is waiting just down the short hallway, back turned toward me as he watches the store entrance. His posture is rigid, hands in his pockets as a plastic bag is looped around his forearm. He looks mostly casual but I know he's ready to reach for his weapon at the slightest sign of trouble.

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