Page 88 of Ghosts of the Dead

“You’re alive.” His voice sounds wrecked.

I let out a shaky laugh, trying to lighten whatever darkness has its claws in him. “Of course I’m alive. What kind of greeting is that? Did you hit your head out there?”

“Thought I lost you.” His voice cracks, and fresh tears gather in his eyes. “God, Autumn, I thought…”

My stomach twists, cold creeping up my spine. “Jace, what happened?”

“I found a rotter.” His eyes close tight, and he shakes his head as though dispelling a nightmare, then his whole body shudders. “Purple hair. Gemini tattoo on the left wrist. Those fucking hazel eyes. It looks like you. I thought it was you.”

The world stops.

My blood turns to ice in my veins. The laughter from moments ago feels like it belongs to someone else in another lifetime. My hand moves on its own, reaching for my wrist. I tear the bandage off with shaking fingers to reveal the ink on my skin.

Gemini. Our tattoo.

Purple hair. We both had it, courtesy of a scavenged box of hair die and a dirty rest area bathroom.

Hazel eyes. We shared those, too.

No.

No, no, no.

The math is simple and brutal. It wasn’t me. Which means…

“Summer,” I whisper.

The name barely makes it past my lips before my knees give out. The ground rushes up to meet me, but Mars is there, dropping beside me to catch me before I hit the dirt. Icollapse against his chest, and the sobs rip out of me and soak into his skin.

She’s gone. My sister. My Summer. The person I’ve been searching for, the hope I’ve been clinging to, it’s all gone.

“Autumn,” Caspian’s voice calls out with alarm.

“What the fuck, Jace?” Mars growls. His arms tighten around me, but I can’t feel them. I can’t feel anything now.

Luna whines and presses against my side, but it can’t penetrate the tsunami of grief.

Their voices rise around me, but they’re muffled by the ringing in my ears, by the sound of my world crumbling to dust. Everything I’ve done, every risk I’ve taken, every sleepless night spent searching, it was all for nothing. She’s been gone this whole time, and I never even knew.

I scream into Mars’s chest. Raw and broken, the sound tears from somewhere deep inside where I’ve kept all my hope locked away. His muscles flex beneath me when he adjusts himself to hold me tighter. One hand moves to cup the back of my head while the other grips my waist like he can keep me from falling apart completely.

But it’s too late. I already am.

Shattered. Splintered. Nothing left but pieces.

I don’t knowhow long I stay crumpled on the ground, sobbing until my voice is gone and my throat feels like I’ve swallowed broken glass. Mars’s bare chest is soaked with my tears while he holds me with his arms wrapped around me like he’s trying to hold the pieces of me together. As much as I want to stay right here and disappear in the warm comfort, I move. I have to. I need to see her with my own eyes.

Holding onto the tiny shred of hope that Jace might be wrong, I push away from Mars and stumble to my feet. Iwipe the tears from my face, even though they keep coming. The tears won’t stop. If Summer really is gone, then I don’t think they’ll ever stop.

“Autumn, wait.” Jace’s voice is rough with guilt when he calls after me.

I don’t answer. My legs are already carrying me toward the only thing that matters now. Mars stands and his muscles tense like he wants to follow, but something holds him back. They whisper behind me.

“We can’t just let her…” Mars’s voice trails off.

“What else can we do? What could possibly help right now?” Caspian’s voice sounds even more broken than when he faces his own nightmares.

‘There must be something…” Mars trails off again. He can’t seem to form a full sentence.

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