Page 33 of Consequences

“There’s been no word on Kiefer for weeks now.”

Turning to face her in the bed they’ve shared every night since he found her again, he rubs his hand along her jaw. The curtains don’t block out all of the outside light, and the small sliver from the bright moon shows her content smile at his loving caress.

“We’ll find him.”

“What if he finds out I’m here before then?”

“He’ll never make it past the front door.”

“I’m scared.”

His lips press to her forehead, and he knows just how much that admission bothers her. Shannon lives her life doing whatever she needs to in order to get by, and that requires a significant level of fearlessness to have survived this long.

“I’m not going to let him hurt you. As long as I’m around, he can’t touch you. I’ll die before I let that happen,” Beckett whispers.

“I’m scared of that, too.”

“What?”

She rubs her nose against his. “I’m scared he’ll hurt you.”

“I’ve been through things you’ll never know. I can handle anything a man like him can throw at me. Especially if it means ending this fear you live in. I never want you to be scared again.”

“After he’s taken care of… What does that mean? For us?”

This position feels more intimate than when they spoon at night as they sleep. He’s waited for her to make any type of initiation when it comes to wanting more because he doesn’t actually know what she’s been through outside of the small amount she’s shared. And they certainly haven’t approached the topic of what they are or aren’t.

“What do you want?”

“Oh, no you don’t. The last time I tried to verbalize what I wanted, I got rejected. You gotta be the first to say it.”

“I want you,” he whispers. “I’ve wanted you for longer than I should have.”

They continue to lie face-to-face, simply looking into each other’s eyes for a while. Both wear only T-shirts and boxers, and when her leg lifts to wrap over his hip, he knows he doesn’t have the strength to stop her if she wants more.

“Take me,” she whispers, her lips just a breath from his, their noses still touching.

“What do you want, Shannon?”

Gently grazing his lips with hers, it makes him yearn for more. It’s barely a kiss, and his tongue slides out to wet his lips as he waits.

“You,” Shannon says.

“For just tonight?”

“All the nights.”

That’s all Beckett needs to hear, and he wraps her up in his arms, pulling her body flush with his as he kisses her for real. A painfully desperate kiss of teeth clanging as he rubs her tongue with his own. It’s not enough. It’ll never be enough.

His erection presses painfully between them, and she shifts to rub herself against his cock. Their boxers continue to be a barrier between them, but it feels better than anything else ever has.

“Please don’t turn me down,” she begs. “I couldn’t take it. I need you like I need water. Sleeping next to you without touching you the way I crave has been killing me.”

If only you understood the pain I felt, Shan.

He slips his hand down her boxers and toys with the curly hair between her legs, smirking as she gasps against his mouth. She’s wet and needy, and he wants to hear her moan before he takes her for the first time. Almost as though it makes up for turning her down when she offered herself to him that last time.

“Yes,” she moans, her head tilting back to expose her throat. “Yes, please, yes.”

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