Page 88 of Consequences

“If you want what I want, you wouldn’t fucking be here!”

Letting out a deep breath, she looks at the ground. Getting angry along with him won’t solve anything, and she needs to keep her wits about her. She wants to pull him closer not push him away.

“I want the relationship you wanted with me. The one I turned away from. The truth of the matter is that I’m scared to death to love someone, especially in the club. It’s why I was hell-bent on keeping things a secret.”

“No, you were ashamed of me. You’re a fucking daughter of the club, so don’t give me thescared to love a member of the clubbullshit.”

“I’ve seen people I got attached to die, Venom. Like you have. I was part of the Hellraisers long before you showed up, and it wasn’t always good. In fact, it was fucking scary.”

Venom looks up at the sky and sighs as though he’s doing his best to keep himself from exploding. “And you were too scared to love me, but you weren’t too scared to fuck me?”

“Don’t you get it? If I loved you, or anyone in the club, I risked losing you. All of you. You live a dangerous life and follow a risky code. I get it, probably better than most, but it’s very, very real to me.”

“And what changed your mind? Why are you suddenly no longer afraid of loving me now?”

The way he says it hurts. Disbelief. “I’m still afraid, but losing you was the hardest thing I’ve ever done,” she says as she fights the tears flooding her eyes. “Living without you keeps me awake at night. I can’t think about anything but you. I’d rather love you and risk something terrible happening than living without you like I am.”

He chuckles without any trace of humor, and it chills her to the bone. “You miss my mouth on your cunt. That’s the only reason you’re missing me and suddenly can’t live without me.”

“God, Venom, this isn’t about sex. Was it the best I’ve ever had? Yes, but if you told me you could never make love to me again, I wouldn’t care. You loved me when I wasn’t sure I was worthy of love. I made a mistake, but haven’t you? Hasn’t anyone ever given you a second chance?”

“Never,” Venom says, and she looks up to find him staring intently at her. “I have never been given a second chance at anything. One and done. I learned a long time ago not to fuck up unless what I’m doing is something I’m willing to lose.”

It makes so much sense now. He doesn’t know how to forgive because no one has ever forgiven him before. It makes Marnie hurt for him. And she loves him even more for it.

“I’m sorry,” she finally says. “Everyone deserves second chances. We’re imperfect human beings.”

Shaking his head, Venom looks over her shoulder. “Like Chuck?”

The mention of her old boss makes her shudder. He blackmailed her and forced her into sexual favors. She’d been on her knees, ready to suck his cock like he demanded in order to save her father when Venom showed up. He saved her for the very first time, and she’s not sure she’d be here right now if it wasn’t for him.

“I concede. Some people don’t deserve a second chance. Bad, deplorable people shouldn’t be granted that luxury.”

“Don’t you get it, Marnie?” he asks and looks her in the eyes. “I’mdeplorable. I put a man through a fucking meat grinder for you. If anyone’s unworthy of a second chance, it’s me.”

To this day, no one has any idea where Chuck ended up, but he will never be found. Thanks to Venom.

Reaching out, she closes the gap between them and cups his face, forcing him to keep eye contact with her. “You did that to save me. You saved me twice in totally different ways, and you are not deplorable. I can’t stand that you see yourself that way.”

Venom pulls away from her and steps backwards. “You and Lex are the only people who have ever told me that. Everyone else agrees with me.”

“I don’t believe we’re the only two. Not after Colt gave you that officer patch. But can you honestly stand there and tell me you don’t believe Lex?”

Looking at the ground, he shrugs. “I betrayed her, and she hates me. It doesn’t matter.”

“Venom—”

“Don’t…” he warns.

Whatever happened with Lex obviously pains him, and she decides to back off. “I told you that as long as you love me,I’m not giving up. At some point, I will wear you down. You’ll see giving someone a second chance isn’t the worst thing in the world. It could very well be the best.”

“I don’t.”

Nodding her head, Marnie leans against the car and sighs in disappointment. “One day, you will see that it is. I know it.”

“That’s not what I mean.”

Her heart races as he stares at his boots. “What do you mean, then?”

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