Page 25 of Jay

This man, who is over six feet tall, has tattoos, and can melt all knickers in a hundred-mile radius with just one smile, is making me swoon by just watching him. My knees go weak when he leans forward and kisses Phoebe’s head. That action alone makes my heart crack, allowing feelings for this man to seep through. It’s like he knows what he is doing to me. Slowly, bit by bit, he is breaking down the walls. I eventually make my feet move, stepping forward with our cups of tea, which are more than likely lukewarm now. Jay hears me and his beautiful smile takes up his face. I can’t stop the smile that stretches mymouthwide.

“I was wondering if you were going to join us or stand there and ogle me allnight.”

“You knew I was there?” I ask, setting the two cups on the coffee table that has a mason jar collection. They are frosted, with stars and acorns and little berries around it. It looks amazing, especially with the small candle lit insideeachjar.

“Baby, I know where you are at all times.” He winks at me. Cockybugger.

“If you say so. That sounds creepy to me.” I smirk at him. He chuckles. I take the seat next to him and reach for Phoebe, my hand sliding across his chest and under the baby. The feel of his body beneath my hands sends tingles through me. I shiver and Jay chuckles. I give him a death glare as I lift Phoebe off his chest and into my lap, but it only makes him laugh harder. She is a little cutie; all chubby cheeks and chubby legs. She’s wearing a wicked Christmas onesie that makes her look like a Christmas pudding, and even has the matching hat. She looks so cute. I cross my legs and sit her in my lap,facingme.

“You look like your daddy. Yes, you do.” I speak to her in a baby voice. “But you have your UncleJay’seyes.”

“So, who’s eyes do I have then?” Jay asks, amused nexttome.

“Funny, little lady. You will leave a trail of drooling boys behind you.” I lean in and blow raspberries on her neck. Her giggles fill the room, making both Jay and melaugh.

“You’re good with her,” Jay whispers at my side. Our gaze locks and flashes of my past hit the front of my brain, bringing back all the pain that I had felt back then. Dale ripped me into pieces with his words and actions. I freeze, holding Phoebe. Staring into her eyes, thinking of what I could have had… The pain slices through me and my chest feels like it’s shrinking. Dale cost me everything I had wanted. I want that againsomeday.

“Kitten. Cassie. Babe, speak to me. Hey, it’s okay. Cass.” I hear Jay’s voice but I can’t focus, the pain is blinding. My body is being shaken and I’m forced out of my nightmare. I turn to look at Jay, who is staring at me with concerned eyes. I look away, seeing the pain I’m causing him, only to find my lap empty. Where is Phoebe? I snap my eyes around the room for Phoebe and see her sitting in her bouncing chair, facing the TV. When did he take her from me? Oh God, did I hurt her? She doesn’tlookhurt.

“Hey, she’s fine. No need to worry.” Jay gently cups my jaw, making me face him. The concern in his eyes isdisarming.

“I’m so sorry. Is Phoebe okay?” I ask. I reach up and wipe the tears away, tears I didn’t know hadfallen.

“She is fine, baby. It’s you I’m worried about. What just happened, Kitten?” His voice is soft, and it is my undoing. I break down. Full, body-wracking sobs break from me. I have cried many times before today, and I swore that I would never cry over him again; over any man. Jay pulls me into his lap and I curl into him, taking in his heat and scent. His arms wrap around me, and I feel safe with him. It is the safest I have felt in alongtime.

“Talk to me, babe.” I shake my head against the crook of his neck. I don’t think I am ready to tell him the full story yet. It might make him run. He may find me weak and pathetic. “You will have to tell me someday, you know. I will always be here, Kitten. Nothing will make meleave.”

I can’t be so sure that he will stay once I tell him everything that Dale did to me. It took me years to get over what he had done, and I will not let him hold that fear over me anymore, but I need to be one hundred percent sure that Jay is in this with all his might. I lift my hands to my face and swipe more tears away. Damn those things, always escaping when they know they need tostayput.

“Baby, the tears need to fall, it means that you are feeling something.” He smirksatme.

“Good Lord, I give up. Do I always say what I’m thinkingaroundyou?”

“Not always, but the best bits come out.” Smirking at me, Jay shifts me so that I’m straddling his hips. Now this is a place I could get used to sitting. I shake off the negativefeelings.

I smirk at him and ask. “So, what are you going to do now, Mr Castle?” His smouldering eyes lock with mine. Damn, he has that look down toaT.

“This,” is all he says. He grips the back of my head and brings my mouth to his with a crushing force. Not that I am complaining or anything. This man's mouth should seriously come with a ‘superhero warning’. He tastes like gingerbread; from the cookies I brought with me. One thing I love at Christmas time is the ton of cookies I get to make or buy, and then eat. Yum. I made the tea to wash them down, but the cups sit forgotten on the coffeetable.

His tongue sweeps across mine, tasting me, savouring me. I moan into his mouth and his grip on my bum tightens. When did they land there? I get lost in Jay. Every time he has kissed me over the last few weeks, I have lost myself, lost a layer of the protective shield I have built around me. Jay Castle has the inner strength to pull me apart like Hulk can rip apart a bus. I feel Jay’s hands slip under my thin jumper, and shiver as he chuckles against my lips. I bull back when a loud cackling laugh comes from the TV. I turn to see the Ghost of Christmas past laugh at Scrooge, and I smile at the TV. I love this movie. Phoebe laughs from her bouncer, and it reminds me that she is in the room.Bloodymen.

I climb off Jay’s lap and walk over to pick Phoebe up out of her bouncer. I turn and place her in Jay’s lap, then walk into the kitchen to get her last bottle of the night. Addy said that she will pretty much sleep the whole night after this bottle, that Phoebe is a great sleeper. I warm up her bottle and make my way back into the living room, where I hear Jay talking to Phoebe. I lean against the door frame and watch themtogether.

“You listen to me, young lady. That smile of yours isn’t going to work on me. You will not get everything you want.” He leans in and kisses her chubby cheek. Phoebe giggles and slaps her little hands on Jay’s cheeks, making him laugh. “Okay, fine, maybe you will get almost everything, almost. Now the boys thing we have talked about. Yeah, you know the thing. No boys until you are thirty, and even then I think you will be too young to be seeing boys. Mmmhmm, I think I need to have a talk with your dad.” He kisses her cheeks again and she giggles. I bet his stubble is ticking her babysoftskin.

“She will break hearts all over the place; she is just like her gorgeous mum,” I tell him, and walk into the room, handing him herbottle.

“Do you want to feed her?” he asks me. I shake my head. He offers me a soft smile while taking the bottle from me, then starts to feed Phoebe. I sit and watch, my heart cracking a little. One day I hope that I can have this: a family ofmyown.

jay

It is Christmas Eve,and I’m a bundle of nerves. Me, Jay fucking Castle, nervous about meeting Cassie’s family. Pretty much her whole family will be there, but it’s the thought of meeting her parents that is setting knots in my stomach. I push my legs fast and harder as I run along the beach front. Running helps me clear my head and sort through things easier. Cassie said that her parents are laid back, even though they come from money, but I’m still worried that they will think I’m not good enough for her. I’m a tattoo artist, for fucks sake, albeit a damn fucking good one, but still, most parents want their only daughter to marry up. Someone with a shit-ton ofmoney.

I get closer to my house and slow my pace, bringing my heart rate down slowly. I drink the last of my water as I come to a walk. Sweat is dripping from every pore on my body. My grey jogging bottoms and grey zipped hoodie not hiding the sweat patches. But, oh fucking well, it doesn’t stop the ladies from eye-fucking me, but they don’t interest me anymore. Only onegirldoes.

Cassie Dawson. Mykitten.

She thought it was strange that my nickname for her is ‘Kitten’ since she is a dog groomer, but she has cat paw prints tattooed on her wrist, it represents her love for cats and all fury animals. Plus, I know that she loves her cat MJ, and her little pup Stark. Which is a fucking awesome name for a dog. We’ve watched so many movies together, had Marvel marathons, plus some action movies. Cassie is a pretty awesome chick, she likes girly films, but she is more into action. We had a big discussion that Black Widow should hook up with Captain America and not the Hulk; I think they would be really hot together, but nope, little-miss-know-it-all says that the Hulk and Black Widow are in love, but he’s denying her. He is a crazy bastard to reject that fine piece ofwoman.

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